Posted by Zo on March 4, 2002, at 19:14:19
In reply to Any other bipolar artist types out there???, posted by ST on March 3, 2002, at 18:46:15
Um, yessss. And a recently medicated one, after twenty years of highs and lows. .. because my Bipolar II was hiding behind: Chronic Fatigue Illness/some toxic (pesticide) hits to the brain; behind Temporal Lobe which are so closely related to mania as to be nearly indistinguishable, except brief. . .really, like little moments from god. . .and which were also undiagnosed. Since childhood. *And* ADD. All three of which are Kindling disorders. So, I kindle. I also paint and write.
It wasn't until the addition of Lamictal to my many meds last fall, after a particular marked and driven period of agitated depression/mania, that I've had anything like normal life.
Having been, amongst all the confusion, a pretty damn genius writer who got "disovered" by a New York agent, and "discovered" by a New York publisher--but whose "manuscript" was a box full of scenes, so it never went anywhere. . .I'll just say, despite the fears, my talent, medicated, is intact. Actually, better for it, because I was always in a lot of fear that the next high would never come. My website's about to go up, my book is out with seven agents. . .it feels good to be integrated and capable, instead of at the mercy of my mood.
I don't think it's a question, anymore, of choosing between which self. I did. But this feels like a blending. It really does. And way less scary. The risks now are with my art.
Zo
poster:Zo
thread:18957
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020223/msgs/19265.html