Posted by Karen_kay on January 9, 2004, at 15:03:44
In reply to Re: To the always insightful » Karen_kay, posted by DaisyM on January 9, 2004, at 14:26:49
I've been thinking quite a bit about the dream... This is what I've come up with...
*My fear that he's going away or leaving me, as well as trust issues (Him dying and not telling me sooner. For some reason I seem to think, though I don't recall for *certain* something about a brain tumor from the dream.)
*Also the fact that I don't always trust him or his approach and I'm a bit skeptical (Mistakes he's made in the past, which were reflected in this dream by him talking about things that didn't pertain to me.)
*My wish to be closer to him, yet pretending I don't and fearing that closeness, emotional, yet portrayed as physical closeness in the dream. Also, I'm not quite sure how to feel things during the session and often project my feelings of aloofness and unsupportiveness onto him.
And I know that it is similar in a lot of ways to the dream I had about my father, which also ended with him crying and me holding him. But, I'm still not ready to think about that.
I actually called him because I know that if I didn't I wouldn't be able to keep it together this weekend and classes start on Monday. He offered me a 4:00 appointment, but I declined. He assured me that he's fine, feeling a bit frustrated since a meeting was canceled, but healthy.
Now, for my *logical* explanation:
Maybe the dying thing came into play because he's had a cough? The vineyard is because the town I used to live in has a vineyard with my last name. I think the crying is a mixture of him saying he might cry during a session and the fact that during the last session I thought he was going to cry because I told him he really hurt my feelings by not returning my phone call. And the hug could be because of the post I responded to regarding the person who asked for a hug and was declined. See, I can think of a logical explanation for everything as well!!And, I wouldn't be against seeing him more often, he just hasn't offered. And I certainly wouldn't want him to think that I need him. That I'm actually working at this. Funny, he asked me on the phone, "Now, when you come in on Wednesday, are you going to tell me what you really think it means?" Apparently he does know me!! Those things I typed up there I would never actually think to tell him! I just don't like it when people know that I need them. I'm actually surprised I called him. He was too! I think that's why he offered me the appointment. And I think if I would have taken it, it would have been good. But, I don't have makeup on right now. And that's a time consuming process. Oh, to be me. I swear, sometimes I just hate it! :(
poster:Karen_kay
thread:294726
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040102/msgs/298688.html