Posted by Fi on April 17, 2002, at 8:36:00
In reply to Definition of a Friend, posted by Angel Girl on April 16, 2002, at 11:30:44
Some great things said already.
I just wanted to add a few things. First is, thank you for posting! You sounded uncertain about doing it, but such questions are certainly our 'patch'.
I had a friend who dropped me completely the first time I was ill, in quite a calculated way (he guessed I was going to be 'hard work' and didnt want the hassle). I would still say he was a good friend before- great fun. But I guess there are a lot of people who arent willing or able to cope with the bad times as well as the good.
My best friend is a very good friend- but she cant cope with me when I am depressed/anxious either. I think its that she doesnt know what to *do*, and is the kind of person that has to feel they can do something. And is not into expression of negative emotion. She continues to be someone I can talk about anything to, when I am well.
I also wanted to say that it can be useful to have some a good therapist/pdoc or whoever when you are going thru a hard time, like now for you. Gives you somewhere supportive when you can say exactly how terrible you feel etc etc without worrying about whether you are being 'good company'. As well as having friends, of course, not instead.
Take care.
Fi
poster:Fi
thread:22189
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020411/msgs/22211.html