Posted by trouble on February 27, 2002, at 1:46:24
In reply to Re: riding the turnip truck, posted by sar on February 26, 2002, at 14:33:03
Gracious Sar! What do I think of it? I think it's screwed up, but no more screwed up than selling your soul to a corporation that pretends you're all family then obliterates your hopes and dreams on a whim. At least a sex worker knows s/he's being screwed. But are these the only two options in life?
Unlike a lot of my friends I don't have a solid pro or anti stance on sex work...but I am convinced that women who trade on their sexuality for subsistance were victimized during childhood, and I am against letting our victimizers map out our life strategies. I think that's weak, and at the same time unavoidable. the courageous thing is to challenge your habits and characterological pollution, even while knowing how hard and thankless and ultimately flawed your efforts will be. I just cannot the people who wrecked me win.
I have such hostitility toward men that I've never considered a life of providing pleasure to them for any amount of money. Plus I was raised Catholic, more or less, and I've got those sex hang-ups. I'm a good girl.
I do relate to the sex victim's adult need to have sexual power over men, I did that in my youth by being a world class prick tease, if I say so myself. The power thing, taking control of a situation over which we had no control during our sexual development seems huge to me, and IMO a big part of what drives women into this work. You do have the power, anyone who tells you the man has the power since he's giving you money is full of shit.
The one who satisfies always has the power. There'd be nothing to satisfy if not for the man's need, ergo , he's in the weaker position, by virtue of his dependency. They know this of course, which explains their raping, choking and killing of prostitutes, if not in actuality, well suffice to say I'm grateful that we are spared a direct line into their fantasy life when they're having sex. Husbands do it too, I'm not singling out tricks.My real concern though is what it does to the inner life of a sex worker to operate in this society. Talk about stigma. So you're poor, female, mentally ill and a whore too. That's a lot of cultural nastiness, it's too much to be warded off on a consistent day to day basis. I think that wearing down is the most insidious and longterm damaging of all.
It would be nice if prostitutes were considered courtesans, keepers of secrets, seductresses and teachers of the sexual delights. If we lived in a world like that I'd be a lot less concerned about the life. But when we have men trying to choke women w/ their cocks and screaming at them to drink it down bitch, no something's fundamentally wrong w/ that, rotten to the core.Anyway this may not have answered your question about ethics, but that's not the place I come from regarding this issue. Maybe someone else has something to offer on that aspect.
Any takers?
trouble
poster:trouble
thread:18267
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020223/msgs/18963.html