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Alcohol

Posted by Partlycloudy on March 23, 2014, at 13:38:51

In reply to Re: Why does s seem like an option? » Poet, posted by Partlycloudy on March 23, 2014, at 12:43:38

I was "in remission" from alcoholism for going on 7 years. Knew I had been getting shaky along with the marriage, but have never responded positively to the 12 step model. When our kitchen remodel started - a year ago and counting - I would buy beer for the contractor and the Gatorade. And I would join them at the end of the day.
One beer becomes two.
Beer becomes wine so there is more beer for the guys.
Hard liquor just came back last week.

It's as bad as when I started. Self hate is right there, too. What. Great reason to drink!! See how crappy a person I am - for sticking around, for not pursuing divorce. Ya da ya da ya da. All mixed up in the crying.
Husband joined in until he didn't. Stops and starts and stops without an apparent effort. (But noooo, he doesn't come from an alcoholic family.)
F*ck.

 

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