Posted by jay on February 7, 2005, at 17:49:07
In reply to Re: Please...I beg for help with girlfriend problem.., posted by Miss Honeychurch on February 7, 2005, at 8:46:19
> Jay,
>
> I am sure I will voice a very unpopular opinion here. And I know I know nothing about your relationship or her or you. But from a purely objective bystander opinion, I'm not so sure this may be the girl for you.
>
> A lot of men like to take on the "rescuer" role with women, coming to the aid of women in trouble and believing they can make things OK again. DO you think perhaps you might be doing this?
>
> All of the somewhat suicidal talk is a big indicator to me that she needs to work on herself before being in a realtionship. BElieve me however, I realize the pull of the physical and it is wonderful to have warmeth and sexuality in your life.
>
> Anyway, I'm just sayin'. However, I'm sure you've thought about all of this. Just thought I would offer a diferent perspective. I've seen some of my friends get into some of these pickles and it is always hard.Thanks so much for your thoughts. I do sometimes feel a bit, I dunno, manipulated maybe, but then 5 minutes later she will turn around and do or say something really sweet. If it becomes really problematic, I am very sure it will surface, and be dealt with one way or another. I am only hoping for the best. Yes, I do agree, talking about the suicidal stuff right to my face, knowing how I feel about her, and how much I tell her that her son needs a Mom there to love and protect him. (His father split when he was born.) One thing that really P*sses me off, pardon the language, is that she keeps on saying that I don't need medication...that nobody really does. Well, ya I may take 5 meds a day, but hell, I like my job,(I worked my A*S off to get it.) can find happiness in my day....think I am a somewhat good person..and have a hell of a lot of love to give and share. I just feel like saying..."So, medication is so bad for us, is it?")
Anyhow...thanks for your perspective...because I have thought of this...and it can lead to really toxic, dangerous areas if it becomes too much.
Take care,
Jay
poster:jay
thread:453999
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050205/msgs/454554.html