Posted by kara lynne on June 11, 2003, at 14:41:45
In reply to Re: Just tired of it (work stuff), posted by noa on June 10, 2003, at 23:44:50
Hi Noa,
I just wanted to get in my vote of support. It sounds like you're on the right track after the conversation with your friend. Once you have your bottom line in place they will feel it as well, and as you said it will be easier to disengage.The boundary violations would get my hackles up. It really is humiliating, all the policing and being treated like a child. I would immediately go into shame and guilt (as well as rage), which they would of course have a field day with. It's so hard to be effective while you're reactive though, and I think your new plan is a much better one. The less juice given this nonsense the better. It doesn't seem *fair*, but I guess ultimately it works in your favor.
Meanwhile of course your rights should be respected, and it sure seems like they're being violated here. I don't know all the political ramifications of handling a situation like this, or the best way to handle it--ie where you are hurt the least. My problem lies somewhere between wanting to take action to make something right and giving up. (I'm hearing "You got to know when to fold"...) It takes me forever to realize when the people I'm dealing are not ever going to "get it" and I'm taking better care of myself by disengaging. It sounds like you're finding the right medium in there somewhere.
Anyway, I really appreciate you here, and I wish you the best.
Kara
poster:kara lynne
thread:233037
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030604/msgs/233200.html