Posted by Dinah on November 8, 2010, at 10:10:34
In reply to Re: I am so sad in my marriage what to do, posted by DAAIM on October 18, 2010, at 2:22:12
He's telling you he adores you, and wants to be with you. He's a good father, and helps around the house. Do you see any of those things as indicating that he really does love you? What would he need to do for you to believe he loves you? Do you think that there are different ways to show love, or only one way?
Is it possible that there is more involved here than your belief about whether or not he loves you? Could it also involve your dissatisfaction with him as a father and husband? Could it be that you think he doesn't love you because you don't love him? If you don't feel the loving energy in the space between you, is it possible that it is not entirely his responsibility for it not being there?
It's fair enough to say that this isn't what you want from life. Does it necessarily have to be his lack of love that is the reason for that?
IMO, staying together for the sake of the kids isn't all that bad. If both partners are willing to put aside their own dreams and make the best of what they have together. Are you willing to do that? Is he? You want something from him that he is unable to give. Is there any compromise you can reach that takes into account your needs and his temperament? Happiness is sometimes something you fight to carve out from reality.
poster:Dinah
thread:962047
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20101023/msgs/969163.html