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the parts of their lives which don't include you..

Posted by twinleaf on April 6, 2008, at 6:21:33

In reply to Re: Your Therapist's Web Site » sunnydays, posted by Daisym on April 6, 2008, at 1:08:49

A thought, Daisy. My analyst doesn't (yet) have a website, but I think it would bother me, too. There's suddenly more of him out there, and he seems to be directing his attention at unknown others. Not you, the way he's supposed to!

The analyst I had prior to this one (the one who threw me out) said a number of times, "I expect you will come three or four times a week for several years, and will then come whenever you feel you need to." I know he meant it when he said it, and I did believe him. Later, he got overwhelmed with what I now know were very serious personal problems, and I got hurt badly in the process. I guess you could call this the universe having a say in what happens despite the most genuine human promises..

The analyst I have now has never said this. What he does do is to keep me in mind EVERY SECOND that I am with him. He is so dedicated to doing this that if he ever feels that he can't, because of slight illness or a distressing event in his own life, he will tell me, and ask if I feel that he's not completely with me. He has a rich, full life- he runs all sorts of analytic things, has published a lot, has a wife who is also a psychoanalyst, children and grandchildren, as well as many interests which show up in the photographs, books and objects in his office. But, as long as he is truly with ME when I'm there, it doesn't bother me too much at all, even though I am just as jealous and envious as anyone, usually! Would this be a good area of exploration for you, or is that already happening?

Very subtle analyst humor:

me" Oh! You've got a chess set! Do you play with patients?"

A: "only if someone walks in who looks as if he would like to play......."

******************************

me: "we work so hard, and then when we finally get it sort if right. we die!:

A: "Wouldn't it be nice if we didn't have to!"

 

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poster:twinleaf thread:821049
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080405/msgs/821827.html