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Re: Depression and Relationships

Posted by Bob (not Dr.) on September 7, 1999, at 10:19:35

In reply to Depression and Relationships, posted by Roo on September 7, 1999, at 7:29:17

> Anyone relate?

You said it, sister! After this weekend, I could
really relate. I feel so guilty because I started
dating my girlfriend when I was caught in a
slight manic response to zoloft the first time I
was on it. A few months later I decided (at my
doc's suggestion) to go off it, and a month after
that I crashed hard. It's been various flavors
of hell since then. It's also been 2.5 years
that we've been together. I feel she fell for a
part of me that may never surface again, and at
times like this past weekend I tell her flat out
to find someone else, that there's no way I can
meet her needs because I'm having too much
trouble meeting my own. I knew that at one time
in my life with her, I would have married her
as soon as we could find a Justice of the Peace or
whatever. Now, I look inside for where those feelings
are hiding and I can find only the slightest
traces of them. Sometimes...no, most of the time,
what makes it even harder is that she's a
clinician in training, hard-core psychodynamic;
and I'm a learning researcher more based in
cognitive, social, and sociocultural psych.

Sometimes I think the only thing I have to offer
her is a frank, honest response. It sounds like
such an "objective" thing--a frank, honest response--
but I know from experience that the definitions
of those words change based on your meds and
your frame of mind.

I guess the bottom line for me, though, is that
no matter how down I get on myself and how much
I feel I have a responsibility to isolate myself
from everyone else so they don't have to experience
the bad side of me, I always have some friends
who flat-out disagree and won't allow me to
withdraw.

So, I guess if my judgment is so bad in the
first place, my friends must be right.

Cheers,
Bob


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poster:Bob (not Dr.) thread:11168
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990829/msgs/11177.html