Posted by Daniel on March 31, 1999, at 12:52:57
In reply to Re: What is "normal?", posted by Shirley on January 16, 1999, at 13:53:17
> Bethany,
> Thought provoking question within this context. I agree with the others that a H.S. or college counselor (or community mental health center, or family physician-referral) would be able to assist you in sorting this out. This might be especially helpful if the way you are feeling is dramatically different for you, is interfering with your ability to participate in "life" (i.e. school, job, friends, family, hobbies, etc), and has been going on for several weeks.
> I remember feeling sort of "disjointed" when I was your age--not knowing what I should do with my life now that I was an adult, not having much direction. I'm approaching my 40th birthday soon (18 years old with 22 years experience) and find myself returning to that disjointed feeling once again--and experiencing a sort of nameless anxiety and fear. Looking on the bright side, even though I THOUGHT I was aimlessing drifting along with no purpose when I was 18, I did in fact make it through college, work, marry, raise a family (still doing that),work, plus some other stuff. So you've got that to look forward to! (??!!)
> One comment about the "Normal" question. I have, on a couple of occassions mentioned (candidly) the way I felt to a counselor, and also a doctor, and they CLEARLY did not think that what I was expressing was normal (the doctor immediately got up and shut his office door!) What's interesting about this, to me, is that I ASSUMED EVERYONE felt this way at one time or another. So this illustrates to me that either there are no gray areas in life (what is normal), or that we've established a social "Line" separating the normal from the sick as a way to prevent cultural discomfort/chaos, or something along those lines. I'm attempting to be helpful here, but I hope that I haven't caused a collective "huh??" with this ramble...
> I wish you luck, Bethany, and encourage you to talk to the kinds of people that have been recommended. You'll feel better just taking that step.
> ~ShirleyI have felt just the same ever since I was 15 years old! The only difference is, I didn't know then what was going on, what was the matter with me, I considered it to be a normal part of life, perhaps all my mates felt the same way... I couldn't have been more wrong.
The problem is, it didn't disappear with my "aging," (I assumed it would as I would gradually "mature"), but, unfortunately, I dragged it on with me into my "adulthood" life. Now, at the age of 26, I feel just as lost and lonely and deserted and insecure and immature... and on and on... as I felt when I was 15 or 18... sort of permanent existential crisis: who or what am I, and where am I going? What is the meaning of life, after all? At times, my despair got so bad I thought of suicide as the last possible "solution" for me... but never attempted one, maybe I'm too much of a coward in this respect (fortunately!!!). I do believe that there is a solution for some of us like me and you Bethany.
Just wanted to add a short comment.
Thanks for reading.
Daniel
poster:Daniel
thread:2382
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990401/msgs/4219.html