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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 25 of 37. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 18:47:18
My T was supoosed to phone me but she forgot....again.
Actions speak louder than words.....
She talks a good line, says she cares, but I think that just her being professional.
She never brings her dogs no more. She used to. :-(
I think she tires of me....
I tire of me.....
I proly should just let her be free.
She proly just doesn't want to be the one to bail on me....
I proly dragging her down.
She said I was challenging. She been talking bout me to her workmate in the practice....
I think I wrecking her.
Making her feel inadequate...
Sh*t.
Leper.
Damn.
Muffled
Posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 19:22:35
In reply to :-( So this is the thing...., posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 18:47:18
running away.
I should write her something nice bout how good she was to me and how much she has helped me so far(she HAS).
And let her down off the hook with grace so she don't feel bad or nothing.
I really don't want her to feel bad.
I was thinking mebbe her man is telling her she getting to close to me and to back off.....
Don't want the nut messing w/their family somehow?...
I dunno.
Wished I did.
Proly just some thing I exude.
Born this way.
Gonna die this way.
Just goto accept that.
Muffled
Posted by TherapyGirl on September 24, 2006, at 19:34:44
In reply to yeah and insteada getting mad and, posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 19:22:35
gotta accept it. It's NOT true.
I don't know what's going on with your T, but it sounds to me like maybe she's either just not very organized or has more to do than time to do it. Is that possible?
I believe she has helped you and that she cares about you, Muffy. Give her a chance to explain and apologize, okay? Hang in there.
(((((((((((((Muffled)))))))))))))))
Posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 19:48:14
In reply to yeah and insteada getting mad and, posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 19:22:35
Story of girl and her T
So there was this girl.
Summat messed.
Got a T.
Drove her T nuts.
But the T didn’t give up.
And this girl was thankful for that.
So she could mostly get past the bad.
And understand lotsa new stuff.
Took her awhile.
But her T was patient and kind.
But the thing is .
This girl.
She figgers anyhow.
And she proly right.
That she sucking T dry somehow.
T works so hard.
Girl kinda stupid.
Kinda crazy.
Frustrating.
So T gets tired.
She got no more left to give.
Girl too confusing. She don’t make sense. She don’t let go.
So T slowly, quietly backs away.
T don’t even know it.
Girl does.
Girl got radar that way.
Actions speak louder than words.
No dogs no more. No call back.
Unconscious, but there.
Actions.
Mebbe girl wrong.
But she think she right.
Girl wishes she wrong.
But the radar.
This girl wants to be good, do good.
To be good, is to let others go so she don’t hurt them.
She knows this is right.
She is too much.
Too much.
So this girl says big thanks to T.
Cuz T did lots.
Made her feel safe awhile.
Made her not feel so weird.
Teached her lots.
Girl don’t blank much anymore.
She don’t need to run so bad.
Girl not evil.
But she sets T free.
T must be free. And that’s ok.
Its ok, its ok, its ok.
The girl is always ok.
That’s the story of this girl and her T.
The End***See she helped me lots. I want her to know that.
:-(
Muffled
Posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 19:57:55
In reply to Re: No you don't... » muffled, posted by TherapyGirl on September 24, 2006, at 19:34:44
> gotta accept it. It's NOT true.
***I dunno. I just dunno.
>
> I don't know what's going on with your T, but it sounds to me like maybe she's either just not very organized or has more to do than time to do it. Is that possible?***She's a little disorganized and busy at times. She has a daughter that has some health issues that crop up now and again.
>
> I believe she has helped you and that she cares about you, Muffy. Give her a chance to explain and apologize, okay? Hang in there.***Yeah, she HAS helped and she do care. But thats just the thing....she proly REALLY don't want to hurt me. She is very kind. And I kinda feel like she's maybe not saying stuff or doing stuff cuz of that. Its terribly important that she be able to be honest and not hide stuff, and then I can be the same.
But one time awhile back I asked a very simple question, and she went around and around verbally,until I MADE her answer. And the answer was all she could say cuz she so nice. I feel like I forced her to be untrue.
(I had asked her if she was sick of me yet ?-eventually....she said, no....) But I think if she was brutally honest she would have said YES. But I made her lie.....I just thot of this.......
:-(
I just dunno if I can beleive her, or if she trying to be nice cuz she pities me or worries about my irl kids or something?
God almighty. I SO mixed up.
Sorry.
>
> (((((((((((((Muffled)))))))))))))))***Thanks for hugs.
Muffled
Posted by TherapyGirl on September 24, 2006, at 20:51:03
In reply to Re: No you don't... » TherapyGirl, posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 19:57:55
I do understand how mixed up you're feeling. I've been there, too, trying to figure out what my T thinks and feels about me, trying to figure out whether or not I can believe her. And the answer to that (for me) is YES. That's not to say she has never let me down -- she has not called when she said she would; she has sometimes withheld information (like about moving her office) until the last possible minute because SHE decided that would be best for me (it wasn't). But the mistakes she has made are because she is HUMAN and/or because she was trying to do right by me. I get mad at her, we discuss, she apologizes if it's appropriate (and I apologize if I've been mean) and we move on. Because she has stuck by me when no one else has.
I really, really, truly believe that your T may be like that, too. So, yes, I think you should fax your writing to her -- it was beautifully put and painful to read, but she needs to know what you're thinking. And then I think you should encourage her to be brutally honest with you (if that's what you think you need). It's possible that you are a challenge, a handful AND someone she cares about and wants to work with all rolled into one, right? Like with kids -- some days, you just want to pull your hair out but that doesn't mean you don't love them or that you want to leave them.
Please give her a chance to make this right, Muffy. I'd be very surprised if she doesn't see the kind, caring woman we see here on Babble.
Posted by ElaineM on September 24, 2006, at 22:53:11
In reply to I thot I could fax her this. Does it seem ok?, posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 19:48:14
Muff,
That's a good fax - it sounds like T has been there for you. But maybe that doesn't have to be the way it ends. I agree with TGirl, cause what if T herself doesn't *need* to be set free. You are one of the kindest individuals I've known and I think T would recognize that too. Stay?
blove, EL
Posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 10:48:38
In reply to Re: No you don't... » muffled, posted by TherapyGirl on September 24, 2006, at 20:51:03
> I do understand how mixed up you're feeling. I've been there, too, trying to figure out what my T thinks and feels about me, trying to figure out whether or not I can believe her. And the answer to that (for me) is YES. That's not to say she has never let me down -- she has not called when she said she would; she has sometimes withheld information (like about moving her office) until the last possible minute because SHE decided that would be best for me (it wasn't). But the mistakes she has made are because she is HUMAN and/or because she was trying to do right by me. I get mad at her, we discuss, she apologizes if it's appropriate (and I apologize if I've been mean) and we move on. Because she has stuck by me when no one else has.
>***Thanks for understanding.
yeah,i reckon my t is human.
Cept now this a.m. I am mad now!
See how I must drive her nuts!
I more familiar w/anger.
I just wanto phone her up and give her sh*t.
But then that would be assuming she cared, or that I was expecting something I shouldn't have, or something????
I don't understand all this stuff.............> I really, really, truly believe that your T may be like that, too. So, yes, I think you should fax your writing to her -- it was beautifully put and painful to read, but she needs to know what you're thinking. And then I think you should encourage her to be brutally honest with you (if that's what you think you need). It's possible that you are a challenge, a handful AND someone she cares about and wants to work with all rolled into one, right? Like with kids -- some days, you just want to pull your hair out but that doesn't mean you don't love them or that you want to leave them.
***now you got me!!! The thing with kids. Totally. Slam dunk! So while now I feel mad, I still like her. even if I don't understand her.....
Guess I kinda scared too some....
If I was to be brutally honest....
>
> Please give her a chance to make this right, Muffy. I'd be very surprised if she doesn't see the kind, caring woman we see here on Babble.Thank you.
I guess I got to give her a chance to explain....
Though in the past it seems to feel more like she making excuses at the same time...
Sometimes it feels more like she my sister than my T.....
I am SO CONFUSED!!!???
However...it'd proly be educational to work thru this, though it seems sort of circular,,,,
Hell, I dunno,
thanks so much for listening TG.
Muffled
Posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 10:53:56
In reply to Re: I thot I could fax her this. Does it seem ok?, posted by ElaineM on September 24, 2006, at 22:53:11
> Muff,
>
> That's a good fax - it sounds like T has been there for you. But maybe that doesn't have to be the way it ends. I agree with TGirl, cause what if T herself doesn't *need* to be set free. You are one of the kindest individuals I've known and I think T would recognize that too. Stay?
>
> blove, EL***Yeah, she been there. She very steady in that way.
Usu. I learn from this stuff.
Just I SO damn stupid it seems to take me FOREVER to learn what everybody must already know.
I feel like a TOTAL idiot.
I dunno what a regular person would do?
Why am I so stupid bout stuff?
Thanks for the post El. Iknow its SO hard for you right now, I truly appreciate this.
You special El.
Muffled
Posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 14:29:55
In reply to :-( So this is the thing...., posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 18:47:18
I believe in you Muffy, you are special, you just don't see it. I am sure your T feels good about working with you, I bet she would say that if you asked. I see that change in you, really.
Posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 15:11:52
In reply to Re: :-( So this is the thing...., posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 14:29:55
Posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 15:24:29
In reply to :-) THX HF :-) (nm) » happyflower, posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 15:11:52
Hey, Muffy,
I am not just blowing smoke, you know that i think the best of you, right? I wish I could meet you someday. ;-)
Posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 15:25:33
In reply to :-( So this is the thing...., posted by muffled on September 24, 2006, at 18:47:18
I dunno what to do.
I think I got appt. tomorrow?
Not 100% sure. I was gonna confirm when my T called.
But then I start thinking, she had left me a message last time and I got scared to call back(a diff. story), so I sent her a fax saying sorry I didn't call back.
So THEN I go to appt, and it was weird, cuz she asked me if I got her message, I said yes, thats what the fax was about. So I dunno why she asked if I got her message? Mebbe she was wanting an apology face to face? I dunno?
So mebbe she didn't call this time cuz she was mad bout last time? Seems a bit of a stretch.....
Yet our last session we spent the whole time pretty much talking about why I was being a turtle bout things, and how it was ok to ask people for stuff. So I'd asked her to do something for me and she said ok, and she would call me back about it, but she hasn't....
So mebbe she mad????????????????????????????
WHY wouldn't she call me back?
HOW could she forget???????????????
I DON'T understand??????????????
I am confused????????????
I scared to call.
I dunno what to do?
Show up?
What if there's no appt? Then I will feel extra stupid and will have to punish myself somehow.
Even if I show up, what to say?
I AM SO FREAKING STUPID.
I am going in circles.
I am tired cuz I been sick. Thats not helping either.
I just wish someone would tell me what to do and I'll just do it cuz I got myself all mixed up now.
My T says stuff, but her actions don't follow.
Mebbe I confused for no reason.
STUPID me.
Now you all know why I think I must be wrecking my T.
Cuz I so dumb about stuff.
TELL ME WHAT TO DO?
I can't even cry, cuz I don't know how.
Freak.
Mufflefreak
Posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 15:30:12
In reply to so you wanna know bout STUPID???**RANT**:-(, posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 15:25:33
You are not a freak! Is it too late just to call to confirm? You are reading too much into this, really, you know your T cares. now say it! believe it!
Or happyflower will come over there and give you a kick in the butt! LOL or a hug which ever you rather have. Sorry I feel a little crazy today.
I am getting a cold, does airborn work? Need to by some kleenex. poopy darn
Posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 15:33:47
In reply to Re: so you wanna know bout STUPID???**RANT**:-(, posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 15:30:12
Posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 15:52:12
In reply to A loving kick of course, I couldn't ever hurt you (nm), posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 15:33:47
Ha HF you don't scare me! LOL.
I have a cold too. Yuk.
Toothache too. Yuk.
So meeb I am being ridiculous.
I proly wasn't very clear.
Lotsa times I don't think I am.
I know what I want to get across, but I don't say it right.
I just proly trying to blame T, when its no doubt my fault.
I am SO annoying.
Sigh.
I don't feel so good either.
Well mebbe I'll just get a good nights sleep and see what happens.
Thanks HF
Posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 16:51:57
In reply to Re: A loving kick of course, I couldn't ever hurt you » happyflower, posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 15:52:12
Yup! Get some sleep, I just woke up from a mini nap. (so beware I am getting my boots on on! )
If you can call her, just confirm, maybe before you go. It is a two way relationship, sometimes we have to kick their butts or call them if they forget. Just don't take it personally, it probably has nothing to do with you, she just had a brain f*rt, thats all. ;-) (don't we all?) LOL
Let us know how it goes, of course! I wish I was seeing my T this week! 1 week to go tomorrow! And you know what muffy, you make a whole lot more sense than a lot a people I know. Be strong! Be you!
((((Muffy) and a kick in the pants too! (don't know the symbol for that! LOL)
Posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 18:13:13
In reply to Re: A loving kick of course, I couldn't ever hurt you, posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 16:51:57
Posted by Lindenblüte on September 25, 2006, at 19:15:55
In reply to Re: A loving kick of course, I couldn't ever hurt you, posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 16:51:57
Muffled,
I just read this thread from top to bottom in one fell swoop.I LOVE the story about girl and T. I think that you narrate one possible ending, but there are a lot of possible endings. I'm not sure that the story is over yet, anyways.
I'm sorry that you can't figure out a way to confirm your appt for tomorrow. How about you wait until super-late- maybe midnight. And you write out a script:
"Hi, this is Muffled. I can't remember whether I have an appt at X oclock tomorrow. I am planning to come for my session at X oclock unless I hear otherwise from you. I look forward to seeing you later. Thanks. (click)"
I think you could have a really interesting chat about this story. Let me know how it goes. :)
And Happyflower- she's hilarious. I think I'd rather be on the "hug" side of happyflower than the "gentlykicking" side of happyflower. Plus, I heard she's athletic, and stuff. *YiKeS!*
I would love to have a Happyflower-Muffled-Lindenbluete (others too!) happy hour with mocktails and a cool bartender.
sigh...
that's what a girl needs sometime, huh?
Posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 20:08:37
In reply to Muffy, you're so cute, posted by Lindenblüte on September 25, 2006, at 19:15:55
Posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 20:48:33
In reply to HA! A cool BUFF bartender!!! LOL (nm) » Lindenblüte, posted by muffled on September 25, 2006, at 20:08:37
yeah with sexy legs too!
Posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 21:26:22
In reply to Re: HA! A cool BUFF bartender!!! LOL, posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 20:48:33
The bluest eyes that you have ever felt looking deeply into your eyes, the look, the look that he wants nobody but you! Yeah, I will have a double of that! LOL damn, I need to get laid someday, I am pathetic
Posted by Lindenblüte on September 26, 2006, at 8:04:10
In reply to AND!, posted by happyflower on September 25, 2006, at 21:26:22
We could nominate someone for bartender?
Mufflie- I'm totally hijacking your thread- you want me to create my own thread on Social?
Anyways, I used to know who, but they have all gone wrong: Val Kilmer is not the sexy beast he once was. Mel Gibson (the blue eyes, tortured Hamlet thing going on) now makes me sick... and? the other guys I'd like to serve me my mocktail with a twinkle in their eye are ... I haven't thought about this in a while... kind of a pleasant reverie... the guy from smallville has gorgeous eyes, but I dunno his sense of humor. Jon Stewart- yeah, he'd be a fun bartender. I like his dimple. Hmm. It's a little too early in the am to be fantasizing. lol
back to the grind!
-Li
Posted by muffled on September 26, 2006, at 9:42:26
In reply to nominations? volunteers? » happyflower, posted by Lindenblüte on September 26, 2006, at 8:04:10
No way, don't go away, I like fun.
Just on this board you goto mention T's once in awhile.
So lets let HF hunky T be the bartender!!!He can shrink us and bartend at the same time. He got good legs etc.
PERFECT!
Mufflie
Posted by Lindenblüte on September 26, 2006, at 10:31:24
In reply to Re: nominations? volunteers? » Lindenblüte, posted by muffled on September 26, 2006, at 9:42:26
Hmm, my ex-T might be a fun bartender, because he has a kind of wicked sense of humor. If you got for the super-fit, older man kind of thing, you might find him attractive. I think his style of bartending would probably be kind of brusque.
We don't DO cosmopolitans here. You want a bourbon or a scotch?
um. scotch.
and then he'd look at you like... isn't there more? don't you REALLY want scotch and soda on the rocks?
And you admit, well, yes I would like my scotch with soda on the rocks. Make it a double. And then he says-- look, you might as well tell me what you want, what's the worst thing that can happen?
-Li
I bet Curtm would be a fun bartender :) We have to be careful not to give him tips in the form of liquor, though. He might get kinda silly.
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