Shown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by muffled on September 18, 2005, at 10:34:32
I don't do hugs. Well mebbe once in a while. Anyhow. Just so you know WE DO CARE. I hate that you are struggling so. But struggle WITH US! Talk to us. You are most definately not alone. There are people on this board that seem to have some idea of what your going thru.
And YES, some people have spoken firmly. Sometimes thats what a person needs.
To me it shows great caring, because most of my life no-one has cared enough to confront me. They just ignore me.
So, anyways. PLEASE try and keep posting.
please.
Muffled. :(
Posted by cricket on September 19, 2005, at 10:45:23
In reply to ((((((((((Kerria)))))))), posted by muffled on September 18, 2005, at 10:34:32
I agree with everything Muffled said.
Posted by kerria on September 20, 2005, at 9:50:31
In reply to ((((((((((Kerria)))))))), posted by muffled on September 18, 2005, at 10:34:32
>
> And YES, some people have spoken firmly. Sometimes thats what a person needs.
> To me it shows great caring, because most of my life no-one has cared enough to confront me. They just ignore me.
> So, anyways. PLEASE try and keep posting.
> please.
> Muffled. :(
Thank you (((((((Muffled))))))safe hugs if ok.It upsets me so much inside when anyone confronts me about things that we're divided inside about, especially if it's something that there's a war inside about.
It strengthens the divisions- not good.
Thank you so much for welcoming me. It's so hard to fit in like this though.Take care,
kerria
Posted by kerria on September 20, 2005, at 10:05:35
In reply to Re: ((((((((((Kerria)))))))), posted by cricket on September 19, 2005, at 10:45:23
> I agree with everything Muffled said.
>
>
(((((Cricket))))) safe hugs if ok.When you're really divided inside about something, doesn't it upset things internally if someone takes your parts side against you or your side against your parts? It strengthens the division and the self critizism inside and
makes me feel like hurting myself. That's the trouble - there's so much self criticism inside.All my life i always wondered why i felt that way when someone gave constructive critisizm. There's so much conflict inside when i talk about my T that i shouldn't even do it- i should know better.
it make me hate myself more.My T is so sad that i'm not able to take steps to communicate. i'm still trying.
Thanks for being there,
kerria
Posted by alexandra_k on September 21, 2005, at 19:20:27
In reply to Re: ((((((((((Kerria)))))))) » cricket, posted by kerria on September 20, 2005, at 10:05:35
(((((Kerria)))))
> When you're really divided inside about something, doesn't it upset things internally if someone takes your parts side against you or your side against your parts? It strengthens the division and the self critizism inside and makes me feel like hurting myself.
Yeah. Thats hard. Really hard. And to feel like someone is only hearing what THEY think and not what YOU think. Or only hearing what YOU think and not what THEY think. So the other person doesn't really understand the full picture of what is going on because they are only hearing part of the story...
And you have to wonder... Whether they would still say what they are saying if they understood all sides to the issue...
Maybe part of the trouble comes...
With perceiving someone to be 'taking sides'.
If they seem to be 'taking sides'
Then you need to give them some of the other side.
So they can better understand.> That's the trouble - there's so much self criticism inside.
Yeah. And thats something to work on right there...
> All my life i always wondered why i felt that way when someone gave constructive critisizm.
Maybe because most of the criticism you have received in the past has been destructive. So now you are ready tuned to interpret constructive criticism as destructive criticisms.
> There's so much conflict inside when i talk about my T that i shouldn't even do it- i should know better.
But other people can gain a fair bit of understanding about the situation... Probably more than you realise...
> it make me hate myself more.
And thats something to work on right there...
> My T is so sad that i'm not able to take steps to communicate. i'm still trying.Yeah. I'm sure he says he is sad.
But what is he DOING to encourage communication?
He seems to be saying one thing...
And doing another...
This is the end of the thread.
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