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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by jonh kimble on March 9, 2003, at 5:44:42
Hi everyone. Im sorry but I just feel like I want to die tonight. I have been struggling with severe social phobia, what is now major depression, add and gad for 5 years. I have never had any help from any meds or councellers or anything. i want to see a phyciatrist soon but my parents say that Im not allowed to live at home if I want to do taht. They insist that I need discipline to whip me back in shape and want me to go to a millitary religious school for half a year. They honestly think it will help me so theyre not being mean, but its so hard on me. I got a job in a chicken slaughter house and they work me 50+ hours a week. A family friend might let me stay in his basement, so i guess im lucky there.
At work my social phobia is so bad. I tried so hard to open up to someone and talked to him for a while, but then I was completely unable to speak. I sat there in total silence and everyone knows im so shy. I feel like everyone is going to pry into me and tear me apart even though they dont. I throw up most days because im so worried, and can hardly eat. I think i have ulcers because my stomach hurts so much all the time. I dont have any friends to talk to and everyone Im close to (all 3 of them) say I need to go to military religious school. I feel so terrible for letting them down, I couldnt finsih high school cause I cant focus. I thought things could be better sometime but it hasnt happened. Five years of hell and now its so much worse. I dont to die but I see no other way out. please help
Posted by Essence on March 9, 2003, at 8:25:05
In reply to so sad, posted by jonh kimble on March 9, 2003, at 5:44:42
I'm so sorry your feeling so bad. Your parents sound like how mine were 14 yrs ago when my depression hit, in denial, and of course worried about the social stigma that a child of theirs has a mental illnes, however, I wasn't a child at the time, I was 28. They told me I was stronger than "it" and to just pull up my socks and get on with life. Thankfully, I didn't listen, I knew I was sick, like you know you are and sought help, without it, I don't even want to hazard a guess as to where I would be now. If leaving home is your only option to seeking help from a psychiatrist, then you know what you have to do. It's going to be hard, but it's your life that's hanging by a thread, not theirs. Your being crippled by your symptoms and no military school anywhere is going to fix that, and actually going may exacerbate your anxiety and depression. Please follow your gut feeling on this and see a psychiatrist.
Ess
Posted by linkadge on March 9, 2003, at 9:31:00
In reply to Re: so sad, posted by Essence on March 9, 2003, at 8:25:05
Only you know what's best for you.
My parents, and I come from a very religious
background, and I don't know how many times
I've been excorcised. (not with all the
bells and whistles of course).Do what you think is best. It will pay off.
Remeber just because you see a psychiatrist
does't mean you don't trust in God.
Have no friends ?
Have one now: [email protected] , email me
anytime. Where do you live ?
Best of LuckIan
Posted by noa on March 9, 2003, at 10:16:59
In reply to Re: so sad, posted by linkadge on March 9, 2003, at 9:31:00
How old are you and are you in school now?
Posted by jay on March 9, 2003, at 10:57:09
In reply to so sad, posted by jonh kimble on March 9, 2003, at 5:44:42
Hi Jonh:
I am so sorry you feel so bad, and are stuck also with what some people call "tough love", but to me this just seems cruel. But, remember, your parents may be ignorant of the whole deal with mental illness, and I am not saying that makes it any easier knowing that. So MANY people are ignorant of this issue that they ignore it because they don't likely understand it. Families are notorious for this.
If you'd like, I could pass along my email addy if you'd just like to talk. This illness is so damn *lonely*, and nobody *wants* to always be alone, I don't care what anyone says. There IS help Jon, and good people who WILL help and do their best for you. It's just being able to find it all, and you obviously feel really stuck and haven't gotten the help. That's one of the major problems; sure the community offers help, but only after you go through a million procedures, loops, etc. I think many of us on here can kinda relate, and I certainly can. For now, do you have a 'diagnosis', and what has your treatment/med experience been like?
Well, for this time being, have your folks given you any room? (Like, even if you go and get un-insured help, like from a Medicaid (sp?) government program, will they leave you be? I ask because that might buy you some time to still live at home, get mental help, finish school, and go from there.) Or are they absolutely going to send you to military school? There are *still* options around that and please don't feel as if there is nothing. (I know..MUCH easier said then done.)
Let's go from there...and again, I'll put up my addy if you wish to talk. Hang in..hang on..and hang tight..and there are great people on this board who will also support you.
Talk to you soon....and prayers and wishes for you...
Jay
Posted by Michael Bell on March 9, 2003, at 12:28:25
In reply to so sad, posted by jonh kimble on March 9, 2003, at 5:44:42
jonh,
Dude, I've known the agony that these types of illnesses can bring, and I'm sorry that your parents aren't more educated about the reality of mental illness. Many people are ignorant about these things. Hang in there, bud.
What meds have you tried (for at least 5 wks?) Have you tried Nardil and/or Klonopin? How about Neurontin, Gabitril, etc? The Nardil may take care of the SP and Depression at same time. Dude, SP & depression are htreatable by meds for many people, it's the side effects that be tough for some. There's got to be something out there for you, if the above ones haven't worked. Don't give up.
Remember -- these illnesses are PHYSIOLOGICAL. There's nothing wrong with you as a human being, just an unfortunate and unlucky problem with brain chemistry. I know that brings small relief when dealing with them, but it gives hope b/c chemical imbalances can be repaired, if not fixed completely. Help will come. Just keep your head up, we're here for you.
Posted by KrissyP on March 9, 2003, at 21:25:52
In reply to so sad, posted by jonh kimble on March 9, 2003, at 5:44:42
Hi, May I ask your age? I ask because If you are an adult, and you feel you would benefit from some therapy-go for it. My parents were sort of the same way your parents are as you speak here.
So, you have ADD, GAD, SP, and MD?
Hey, you're working-That is great any job is great-you are working:-)I can't at the moment and am just a senior in college and trying to get my BA. Follow YOUR heart buddy. I know you may feel there are circumstances that inhibit you from doing so, I understand fully.
IF THINGS GET WORSE CALL THE ER.
I am not, at all, "passing you off" here. I've been where you're at.
Are you in counseling at all now? Are you thinking about it? (Despite what your family and friends ssay/feel?) What meds are you on now? I would strongly suggest that-even though you feel it won't work or hasn't in the past. This is YOUR life, my friend, stay strong, be patient, and we are all here for you.
God Bless and keep me posted please,
Kristen===========================================================================================At work my social phobia is so bad. I tried so hard to open up to someone and talked to him for a while, but then I was completely unable to speak. I sat there in total silence and everyone knows im so shy. I feel like everyone is going to pry into me and tear me apart even though they dont. I throw up most days because im so worried, and can hardly eat. I think i have ulcers because my stomach hurts so much all the time. I dont have any friends to talk to and everyone Im close to (all 3 of them) say I need to go to military religious school. I feel so terrible for letting them down, I couldnt finsih high school cause I cant focus. I thought things could be better sometime but it hasnt happened. Five years of hell and now its so much worse. I dont to die but I see no other way out. please help
Posted by KrissyP on March 9, 2003, at 21:27:03
In reply to Re: so sad, posted by Essence on March 9, 2003, at 8:25:05
Posted by Tepiaca on March 10, 2003, at 11:52:02
In reply to so sad, posted by jonh kimble on March 9, 2003, at 5:44:42
hi john, Im passing exactly for the same problem
I have a severe SP , nothing have work in the last 7 years , I also have lack of motivation
depression . I dont have friends , Im always alone
Im 24 years old and Im still a virgin .Im always thinking of suicide.
Maybe you can tell us in what medicines have you been? What happened with the nardil ? I think this is my next medicine , hope this can help me
We can be friends , Im also feel very lonely.
What happened with the abilify ??? did you try it?
There is also Cognocitive Behavior Therapy (bad spelling sorry ) try this, maybe can help you
I havent try it yet , because its not available where I live.
Ok my friend lets keep in touch
Like I said before , My problem is very similar.We can help each other to find the best treatment
Good bless us
Tepiaca
Posted by mopey on March 10, 2003, at 13:23:19
In reply to so sad, posted by jonh kimble on March 9, 2003, at 5:44:42
I'm sorry your parents aren't supportive. Are there any adults you'd feel comfortable confiding in and whose advice you'd trust? I think a doctor is a good place to start.
Hang in there. Looking back on my life I can see several situations that looked so grim at the time that I couldn't see how I could go on.
You can get past this and into happier times. Don't feel you have to do it alone -- find help from a reliable source and do what you need to do to feel better and happier.
Please keep posting so we know how you're doing, and remember how many people here are in similar situations and rooting for you.
All the best
Posted by Maeryn on March 10, 2003, at 17:28:00
In reply to Re: so sad..PLS read jonh!! » jonh kimble, posted by jay on March 9, 2003, at 10:57:09
I am so sorry that you are going through what you are going through, I know how hard it is to have your parents tell you to pull up your socks and get over it also. I made my move through school I asked to talk to the school counciller, it is totally confindential and it might help out, maybe the couniller could talk to your parents and explain that help is needed, and that it is an illness not just a phase. I posted a post on I think the seventh or so and it was called my feelings summed up into a few paragraphs maybe if you read it, you might see that maybe there are others who feel like you. Knowing that you aren't alone helps.
Posted by jonh kimble on March 11, 2003, at 4:56:32
In reply to re:so sad, posted by Maeryn on March 10, 2003, at 17:28:00
Thanks so much everyone. At least there are some people alivewho understand. i would love to talk with you guys but its really hard. (or impossible) social withdrawl is so big with me I dont think I could really keep in touch but I want to so bad. My social anxiety is wierd. Im not really afraid of people ( at first), Im just unable to interact. (unable to show care, enthusiasm, dont ever talk) and I know this makes others think I dont like them, because that is exactly what it looks like. but there are people I so badly want to be friends, including you guys. I know how to interact but it is a constent struggle. I have tried nardil at 60mgs for 4 wks and it did nothing. also a whack of other meds but dexedrine and ritalin are the only ones that helped, but i built up a tolerance in a day or two and i became suicidally depressed on the come down.
also I hate every second of my job. the money is not worth my life, but i cant move in with that guy unless I work. are there any community places are social programs that could offer me a place to stay? I dont mind if its not nice and I dont expect any money, just a place to live so I can get the help I need. This is really my only hope. (i live in canada) thanks again
Posted by jonh kimble on March 11, 2003, at 5:02:58
In reply to re:so sad, posted by Maeryn on March 10, 2003, at 17:28:00
i read something desrcibing a disorder called limbic add. Fits me exactly. Also said that stimulants are often best treatment, as was the case for me, but like i said that didnt work out. anybody know anything more about this?
Posted by Krissy P on March 11, 2003, at 13:47:27
In reply to re:so sad, posted by jonh kimble on March 11, 2003, at 4:56:32
Hi again, if it helps, I can relate when you say (unable to show care, enthusiasm, dont ever talk) and I know this makes others think I dont like them. This took me a while to realize, but once I did, I no longer gave this impression to people and they, and me, were much better off. I wish you the best always,
Kristen
================================================================================================== > Thanks so much everyone. At least there are some people alivewho understand. i would love to talk with you guys but its really hard. (or impossible) social withdrawl is so big with me I dont think I could really keep in touch but I want to so bad. My social anxiety is wierd. Im not really afraid of people ( at first), Im just unable to interact. (unable to show care, enthusiasm, dont ever talk) and I know this makes others think I dont like them, because that is exactly what it looks like. but there are people I so badly want to be friends, including you guys. I know how to interact but it is a constent struggle. I have tried nardil at 60mgs for 4 wks and it did nothing. also a whack of other meds but dexedrine and ritalin are the only ones that helped, but i built up a tolerance in a day or two and i became suicidally depressed on the come down.
Posted by Tepiaca on March 12, 2003, at 11:18:04
In reply to re:so sad, posted by jonh kimble on March 11, 2003, at 4:56:32
hi john ,just one thing , maybe you should try again Nardil at a higher dose 90mg , for more than 4 weeks . I dont know to much about MAOIS , but Ive have read that It could take more than 4 weeks to kick in . You can ask to experts on MAOIs
there are many people here who use them.
Did you already try Abilify???
This is the end of the thread.
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