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Re: I'm so lonesome I could cry...for HELP! » jay

Posted by Sobriquet Style on April 12, 2006, at 13:22:15

In reply to I'm so lonesome I could cry...for HELP!, posted by jay on April 11, 2006, at 19:31:28

You may find this short story of one mans experience entertaining...

Dear Software Engineer,

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that
the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of
space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included
in the product brochure.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and
launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other
system activity. Applications such as Smoking 10.3, Boozing 2.5 and
Saturday Night Pubs 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever
selected.

I cannot keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of
my other favourite applications like Night Club 4.3, Dance 'n'Drunk 2.0
and Bachelor Party 7.77.

I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the UN-install Does
not work on this program. Once I tried to uninstall Wife 1.0 but got
this error "General protection Fault in module House Security. The
UN-installation will abort." Can you help me , please!!!


Regards Desperate User
-----------------------------------------------------

Reply from Tech. Support

Dear User,

Ref: Upgrade from a girlfriend to a wife


This is a very common problem men complain about, but is mostly due to a
primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife
1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT
program. Wife 1.0 is actually an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its
creator to Run everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge
Wife 1.0 and still.convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to
UN-install, delete, or purge Wife 1.0 from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to
do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end
up with more problems than the original system.

Look in your manual under "Warnings-Alimony/Child Support" which was
given to you at the time of registration with Wife 1.0. I recommend you
keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife 1.0
installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section
regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs).

The best course of action will be to enter the command C:\> APOLOGIZE.
In fact I would suggest you use this command every time Wife 1.0 crashes
on your system. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance.
Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife
1.0. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 5.0 or Movies 4.5, which
will improve the performance of Wife 1.0. Do not, under any
circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a
supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible
damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,

Tech Support.

~


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