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Re: The scarf

Posted by Emily Elizabeth on March 30, 2006, at 23:32:15

In reply to Re: The scarf » Emily Elizabeth, posted by Deneb on March 30, 2006, at 15:32:23

Just as a point of comparison, I see my pdoc for 30 minutes every 2-3 weeks AND I see my T for 50 minutes 2x/week. I'm not super-crazy or anything, but dealing w/ problems like these takes time. 80 minutes per month is very little. I'm just encouraging you to take your problems seriously and to get yourself adequate treatment.

For the record, I do think your problems could be addressed in therapy and doing so would improve your quality of life. Sometimes I worry that you are saying you are unhappy, but you also seem hesitant to change things in your life to improve things. I won't keep trying to convince you, but every now and then I feel like I just have to say something about it.

Best,
EE


> > Scarves and hugs aside, I think that the real good that can come from this situation is a better understanding of yourself and your attachments.
>
> I don't usually attach to people. That is why I don't have any close friends. This Bob attachment is new. I don't know why I'm attached to Bob, and I'm not sure I would figure it out in therapy. Even if I did, I'm not sure it would change anything.
>
> >I know that you say that your pdoc is your T, and so I have my fingers crossed that this means that you see her for at least 50 minutes each week. (If not, pretty please see if you can do this).
>
> I see her once every 2 weeks for about 40 mins. I think it's enough. She told me to see her once every 2 weeks.
>
> > This hugs/scarf issue is something that you need to dissect and process in a therapy setting.
>
> I'll talk to my pdoc about wanting to hug Bob next time. I'll see what she says about this.
>
> > I know that you have some intense positive feelings for Bob--that is absolutely OKAY.
>
> I'm glad you think it's okay. :-)
>
> > However, I am confident that these feelings are complex and relate to your life as a whole.
>
> I think I love Bob because he doesn't really interact with me. I think I love Bob because he's a safe person to love. I would get scared and back away if he started to act like a real friend.
>
> > You still have time before you meet Bob--you don't need to decide this right now. Keep knitting and you can decide abt what to do with the scarf later.
>
> Will do. :-) I think I'll give him the scarf. If he reads my posts, he won't be surprised.
>
> Deneb*


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poster:Emily Elizabeth thread:626334
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060324/msgs/626950.html