Posted by beardedlady on April 20, 2002, at 6:30:39
In reply to Re: What defines an ED? - a little more info, posted by Katt on April 20, 2002, at 0:00:59
Katt:
I didn't see your last line and am really sorry to have posted before I read it completely.
I want to tell you not to hate being you right now, but that's something that really does happen to most of us. At difficult times in our lives, we hate being us. I hate being me this morning because I had to take a sleeping pill AGAIN! I have taken sleeping pills five of seven days this week; before this, I hadn't had one in six weeks. Between July and December, I'd had about five.
Whatever I'm going through right now sucks. I hate being me, the weak, pathetic loser who, after 36 years of excellent sleep habits, has forgotten how to go back to sleep after waking up at 2:00 a.m. to go to the bathroom. I wake up almost every night at 2:00 or 2:30, and I hate it. And I hate myself for having to take pills.
My sister has asthma and terrible allergies. She has been in the ER a couple times this year from severe asthma attacks. She worries about dying from it and sometimes hates herself.
My mom carries the weight of the world and her children on her shoulders. She hates being herself sometimes.
I am guessing you asked the question about your eating disorder because you already knew the answer. I could be wrong (it's happened once or twice!), but you probably know the signs as well as anyone else. It's a hard thing to beat, but most people do. You'll come through if you get yourself some help. And come here for some extra support. It's a caring place.
Now, take care of yourself.
beardy : )>
poster:beardedlady
thread:22276
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020411/msgs/22300.html