Posted by Manda on April 17, 2002, at 16:48:51
In reply to Re: Taking time off for school or going to a hospital? » Manda, posted by kiddo on April 17, 2002, at 16:32:03
Kiddo,
I have a therapist, and I just got a pdoc (as in, about 30 minutes ago!). My therapist is concerned about how I've been doing, but she doesn't seem as worried as my boyfriend and my priest (probably at least partly due to her position and partly due to the fact that she hasn't seen me at my worst).
As for going to a hospital, I don't really know- it really depends on my mood (which changes constantly- part of the reason why they're so worried). Sometimes it sounds absolutely wonderful b/c I feel so overwhelmed with responsibilities and expectations, etc. On the other hand, it makes me feel like a failure or something. I've always been one to be responsible and take care of myself and others, so going into a program like that is so contrary to my nature in some ways. Also, it just seems like it would disrupt my life so much, and I don't think that my family and friends would ever treat me the same way. So many people in my life don't really have a clue that I'm having so much trouble, and there's no way to hide it when you go into a hospital. Hmm... I don't know...
I took a very light load last semester (9 hours, instead of 15+), and it didn't seem to help all that much. I still had major problems with getting all of my schoolwork done, even though it wasn't that much. That's part of why I'm so frustrated right now- I keep giving myself easier situations to deal with, thinking that I can just focus on getting better, but it doesn't work. Last summer, I didn't apply for a job and I didn't go to school b/c I wanted time to relax and get better so that I could start off better in the fall. Well, it did no good- my fall was worse than last spring. So, basically, I get progressively worse as time goes on, regardless of the situation. :(
Anyway, I don't have to decide about either today. Right now I'm just trying to survive this semester- I don't know how in the world I'm going to get through it, but I'm praying that I will. Hopefully, my new pdoc will be able to help me. I just wish that I could get in to see him before the first day of my finals. :( Well, I guess that's about it. I'm about to be late for my appt. with my therapist...
-Manda
> Hi Manda-
>
> I couldn't see any previous posts from you so if I ask something that's been asked before, I apologize. Do you have a pdoc (psychiatrist) or therapist? I'm not sure what all is going on in your life so this may or may not help.
>
> Friends, family, and even strangers are often quick to give offer advice now I'll throw in my 2 cents worth :-). What do you think about going into the hospital? I know it's frightening but do you think it's what would be best for you? Are you working? Perhaps if things are too much you could take off one semester or lighten your course load.... are either one of those an option? What about a local support group?
>
> Maybe you could sit down and write down the pros and cons of each one, and prioritize everything, seeing what can be changed and what you need to do.
>
> Maybe one of those are an option?
>
>
> Kiddo
poster:Manda
thread:22216
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020411/msgs/22219.html