Posted by Fi on April 10, 2002, at 12:09:33
In reply to Re: donations, posted by friend on April 8, 2002, at 13:20:21
That sounds a really hard one re whether you should tell people about her using the Board, and what she said.
I dont think there is necessarily a 'right' answer. Its important to do what *you* are most comfortable with.
Personally, I think you make a very good point when you say that Sar herself chose not to tell her friends about the Board, or her feelings. So she certainly didnt want them to know when she was alive.
I've been thinking: would I feel less upset if a friend of mine killed themselves unexpectedly (to me) and I later found out they had told a Board how bad they felt? I dont know- I might feel slightly comforted that they had some support, but could make me feel worse that *I* hadnt known. And raises dilemma you had of whether or not I should read her posts. I dont think I would be angry at Board members who knew and didnt 'do' something to prevent it, but I guess some other people might react that way.
An in-between tactic would be to tell them that you had spoken with her occassionally (but not recently) and knew that she sometimes felt really bad. But I realise that could get complicated as its not entirely true, and if they persisted in wanting to know more details,you would be in a worse mess than saying nothing.
Look after yourself, whatever you decide. That's the most important thing.
Fi
poster:Fi
thread:21660
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020403/msgs/21842.html