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Re: Sometimes I hate therapy » HannahW

Posted by Adia on October 15, 2003, at 23:01:54

In reply to Sometimes I hate therapy, posted by HannahW on October 15, 2003, at 21:10:28

Dear Hannah,

((((Hannah)))
I am sorry you are not having a good night and things were tough today.. :o(
You were and are sooo brave to go to a sex therapist with your husband and to ask for help.
I am sorry it didn't go as you expected and you felt talked down...
I would have felt uncomfortable and hurt. Maybe she didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, but I would definitely feel upset.. :o(

Your therapist...
It is true that if she is your therapist she can't be your friend but that doesn't mean that she doesn't care about you...
Maybe you need to feel more support or warmth from her...
My T has shared that she can't be my friend but she says she is my therapist and cares about me..and I feel that and it is okay for me because I do feel her with me and I feel safe when I see her and cared for.
Maybe you need more time with your T to feel safer inside or feel more secure in your relationship with her...

I am thinking of you and sending you lots and lots of support...

Wishing you a good session tomorrow..
I'll be holding you close inside my heart,
Adia.


> Today I added another plate of therapy onto my already overloaded tray. My AD's have brought about a snowball effect that has resulted in trouble in the bedroom for both my husband and I. It didn't get better, so today we went to see a sex therapist.
>
> Yuck. I'm very open in talking about sex and it doesn't embarrass me at all. But I felt really talked down to. She said I need to be "educated" about the sexual functioning of men, and then proceeded to educate me like I was a pubescent virgin. My husband was trying to explain something to her, and she kept cutting him off and said, "Your talking more and faster isn't going to help me understand any better. I need to process this..." When we asked about how long we should expect to have to see her, she hemmed and hawed all over it, but did say that one time she "cured" a couple in one visit. "Cured?" Like *she* did all the work?! I don't know, maybe I'm just being silly and sensitive.
>
> On top of this one speaking to me like a child, I'm back to wishing my therapist would be my friend. I keep thinking that if she *wanted* to, she could. She just doesn't like me enough to want to. So I'm feeling rather diminished tonight and dreading my appointment with my pdoc therapist tomorrow. It's hard to be with her, growing increasingly fond of her, and have her not feel the same way.
>
> Feeling pretty crappy tonight....


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poster:Adia thread:269838
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