Posted by BarbaraCat on September 24, 2003, at 15:35:11
In reply to Re: How does lamictal feel and how much does it he » BarbaraCat, posted by nmk on September 24, 2003, at 12:34:08
Hi Nicole,
No problem, and thanks for your support in allowing me to voice my thoughts about this long and difficult journey. This will be a long post (so what else is new) but will distill much of what I've learned.First off, I'm not familiar with the zoloft/lamictal combo. I was on zoloft for many years and it was probably the best of the SSRI's that I was on, but my severe mixed states bipolar disorder always broke through. One thing that it did do in general (when I wasn't in a desperate state) was to diminish anxiety. In general, I reiterate, because when there was a real imabalance going on, chemically or life circumstances, it wasn't adequate.
Lamictal can certainly cause anxiety, at least in my experience. You might get other opinions, but they would be in the minority. I haven't heard much success using it as a stand-alone antidepressant, which is probably why you're taking zoloft. However, Lamictal seems to do best along with another mood stabilizer, which zoloft is not.
I know what it's like to wake up feeling like you're underwater since I've taken meds that did this. It works for sleep but leaves you dragging for most of the day, and that in itself is depressing. It could be that the Seroquel, which is in the anti-psychotic family, was managing the anxiety and you're feeling it's absence. Also likely is that you're going through withdrawal symptoms from dropping it. Ativan is a nice sleeper and wears off nicely. However, like any benzo it's going to build up tolerance eventually. But in the meantime, a girl's gotta get her sleep.
However, here's a thought. Antipsychotics, like Seroquel, Zyprexa, Risperdal, have a place in mood disorder relief, especially the kind that has a high anxiety component that veers towards psychosis (mine were like that even though Zyprexa didn't help me). They work best in this capacity for agitated depression rather than the vegetative couch potato sleep all day kind. The fact that you need a sleep aid tells me that have this agitated kind.
Perhaps you alternate between feeling like you're dragging and dreary, and then you're in the grieving panicy kind with some brief normal interludes in between?. This was certainly my pattern and I have since found out I was bipolar rather than unipolar major depressed. From reading "Why your depression isn't getting better", does it seem like you might also have bipolar symptoms? If so, zoloft is not the answer, as was driven home repeatedly in the book. It will aggravate a bipolar disorder sooner or later. Now, paired with Lamictal which is probably intended as the mood stabilizer may likely temper some of the destabilizing SSRI effects, but Lam is in itself agitating, as I went into above.
So, long story short. I agree with you in your concerns about polypharmacy. It's not addressing the underlying neuro/bio imbalance and in fact throws the physical system more and more out of balance. The liver especially has a hard time with all these meds and begins to lose efficacy throughout the whole system which is a bad thing. The receptor sites in the brain start 'clogging' after a while and upregulating, creating more and more receptors to desperately try to maintain homeostatis when they're getting hit with so many artificial substances. Stress certainly throws everything off as well and the immediate concern is to relieve the stress caused by the brain revolting to get it out of danger, but putting bandaids on it isn't helping in the long run. No one really knows what's going on with these meds anyway and to continue to pile one upon the other is shooting in the dark, and YOU'RE the target!
One thing I'm learning so strongly, especially in the last year when alot of my own 25 year search has finally begun to shed some light, is to take care of underlying imbalances. Not to just drop the meds you're taking now, but seek out a whole-person health practioner who really knows their sh*t to help you through the next phase. You may have to search and ask and get recommendations before you find a good one, but it's well worth it.
I found a fabulous naturopath a few months ago after going to more than one 'natural healing' clueless personage. Along with her naturopathic doctorate, she fortunately has a masters in psychology and a background in biopsychiatry, so I'm lucky to have found her. She refuses to just throw 'supplements' at me, saying that my body can't absorb or use them in it's present state. How refreshing considering so many of them supplement their own incomes in this manner. Be wary of any holistic doc who pushes lots of supplements!
Her theory is that 90% of our current mood disorders are caused by imbalances in the physical body, primarily hormonally, primarily caused by the damaging effects of stress. And so many hormones to choose from and not just the obvious ones. I've been undergoing numerous tests for all my systems - hormonal, digestive, heavy metal toxicity - and am learning about the interlocking influence one disbalance has upon the other and how delicate the process is in healing long-standing disorders. These are things that our pdocs or maintstream docs NEVER consider or correlate with our multi-layered dysfunctions. The poor majority of medical folks just have no idea how to go about this. They aren't taught these more delicate sciences in school, and the whole mainstream medical conglomerate is funded by pharmaceutical industries, so you really can't blame them. It's like we're all in this mass medical trance. However, you don't have to put up with it because there are powerful alternatives to this sad state of affairs.
I'm finding out how unrelenting stress, both from childhood and from ongoing life circumstances, has depleted and unbalanced so many systems and how these imbalances directly affect the health of the neuro systems. I'm very slowly, system by system, bringing things back into balance by natural hormone therapy, healing my digestion, giving up alcohol, stress reduction. All these things I knew before, but working with someone who really understands their interrelation and can monitor my progress has been essential.
You can't expect to heal by throwing yet more stressors into an already stressed out body, mind and spirit. Medications that are foreign to our systems are going to cause stress and piling one up over the other is compounding it. If I were you, this is what I'd do. 1. Stay with your pdoc for the time being, and discuss your concern about too much meds. Discuss the possibility that you're bipolar and the wisdom of zoloft if that's the case; 2. Start the search for another pdoc who isn't so aggressive and one who thinks things through when new symptoms crop up (the fact that he forgot about the Seroquel doesn't inspire confidence); 3. Stay off Seroquel, but expect to feel rocky while you adjust. Take an Ativan as needed during the day, but not every day or tolerance will build up. I like Ativan. It got me through some hellish times before I went on Lithium; 4. Find a holistic practitioner who looks at the whole body and does NOT throw yet more pills at you in the form of vitamins, etc., but is willing to gently bring the body back into wholeness. It's a longer road, but it's taken you a long time to develop this imbalance.
You need to stay on pharmaceutical support while this process happens for the obvious reasons, but at least you'll start the deep healing process at the root of things. Finding the right psychopharm combo will help keep you on track while you're tracking down the underpinnings. Being on the wrong one will derail your efforts.
After so many years in hell, I now wake up each day now with a sense of hope and lightness of spirit. I'm not 'cured' by any means, but I can go through anything as long as I have hope and a sense of progress. Bless you, Nicole, and keep in touch. - Barbara
poster:BarbaraCat
thread:261445
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030923/msgs/262990.html