Posted by allisonm on August 21, 2000, at 22:00:53
In reply to Re: still worried Allison, posted by Cindy W on August 21, 2000, at 2:32:44
> Allison, thank you for your post! Will try to talk about it all with my pdoc tomorrow afternoon. You sound much braver than me. I've been separated for about 4 years now, but am so afraid because I've married for 24 years, half of my lifetime. I feel very confused, afraid, and alone and am very afraid my pdoc will reject me too. Will let you know what happens.
Cindy, how did it go?
I was crushed when my husband told me two years ago that he didn't love me anymore. We'd been through hell together over 12 years. I couldn't understand how things would fall apart now. It didn't make sense. Now that he's gone, I have had a lot of time to see just how much of myself I lost in this relationship -- how much of myself I gave up in order to "fit in." How much I bent to keep the peace. It wasn't worth it. I'm glad he's gone. He did me a big favor by leaving. I have had a lot of people let me down int he last few years. Seems every other time I see my psychiatrist, he's pointing out how I've been let down here, there, everywhere. I am terrified of people leaving me. I can see patterns of this in many of the things that I do. I am trying to correct that.
If there's nothing there for you with your husband, no use keeping yourself tied to him. It sounds as though you've pretty much freed yourself if you've found an SO and haven't been with your husband for that many years. I'd finish it. What is there to lose? Just my .02 to add to yesterday's .02...
I hope things went well today. I'd hate to see you have to find another doc and change your meds if this setup is working. It takes so much work to switch.
Anyway, take care and let me know how you are.
Best wishes,
allison
poster:allisonm
thread:41918
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000811/msgs/43481.html