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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 21 of 21. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 10:38:09
I have been trying to work at the office rather than at home, because I'd like to work more standard hours and come home and forget about work, and I realize that distractions at home cause me to stretch out my work day. My therapist is firmly behind this plan. He never has thought it a good idea to work at home.
But I get so very tired at work. I come home so exhausted that I feel sick.
I know it's only been a couple of weeks, and I'd like to give it at least a month. And I keep hoping that I'll relax at work, since I know a lot of the tiredness comes from my being tense at work.
I used to work at the office all the time when Daddy was there, and even when he wasn't literally there but called me a lot when he became wheelchair-bound. It must be possible.
I hate to bring this up today at session or let my therapist know exactly how bad I feel. He's going away for a long weekend, and I'm afraid if I say something he'll perceive it as my decompensating before his absence (or after, if I wait to tell him Tuesday). And there's nothing really he can do anyway.
I'm getting all those not so good thoughts again. But I'm used to them, I guess, and won't act on them. They're a bit unpleasant though. I can mostly control them when I'm awake. But I'm often not very awake because I'm so darn sleepy.
It's not unusual for me to feel sick when I'm this tired, although since I'm getting plenty of sleep I'm not sure why I feel tired enough to feel sick.
Posted by MidnightBlue on March 27, 2008, at 10:45:25
In reply to I feel so tired and sick, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 10:38:09
Dinah,
So sorry you are feeling so bad. I feel terrible, too. Trying to decide if it is just nerves or if it really is something. I feel like I have been run over by a steam roller.....
MB
Posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 10:48:11
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » Dinah, posted by MidnightBlue on March 27, 2008, at 10:45:25
That about sums up how I feel. :(
If you throw in some nausea and ear ringing.
Posted by Phillipa on March 27, 2008, at 12:07:25
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » MidnightBlue, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 10:48:11
What's going on feel the same? So what's the answer or isn't there one? Love Phillipa
Posted by muffled on March 27, 2008, at 13:08:26
In reply to I feel so tired and sick, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 10:38:09
Dinah, sorry you feel bad.
You been checked fully at dr?
This time of year is tough for many.
Can you work a shorter day for the first bit to wean yourself into work?
I dunno what your work is like, but for me, just to be around alot of people for long periods of time can be challenging.I dunno what it is, their 'vibes' or what? It may be that its just gonna take some time for you to get used to being there.
Is there anything you can do to make your workplace somehow more soothing to be there? Quieter? Paintings? Lighting?(I hate flourescent lights myself).
Just thots.
You been having some tough times. give yourself a break. I hope you recognize how hard you are working to do right things.
M
Posted by DAisym on March 27, 2008, at 14:58:26
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick, posted by Phillipa on March 27, 2008, at 12:07:25
I know you know all this but:
Being tense can and does effect your blood sugar. I hope you are testing a lot. Being in an office environment is exhausting due to florescent lights, machines humming, air conditioning, more germs your body has to fight, etc. etc. You need to take breaks, go out and take a quick walk, eat lots of protein and drink tons of water. There are days when I just can't stand being in my office and I have two windows!
And those bad thoughts...you know you need to talk about them. They grow and gain strength when kept secret. Airing them out is important. They might not go away, but talking about them can help minimize them. And I think you have a commitment to being authentic in therapy, so don't change that now. He'd want to know. So what if he thinks it is about him leaving? It might be on some deep level - but how you are feeling is just as important as why you are feeling that way.
Sometimes the distractions at home are better than the anxiety of an office. I hope you feel better soon.
Posted by raisinb on March 27, 2008, at 18:48:31
In reply to I feel so tired and sick, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 10:38:09
Dinah, I hope you feel better soon.
This might be a shot in the dark, but there is a *terrible* flu virus going around this year (could it reach Louisiana? I don't know :)). It causes a lot of fatigue, achiness, nausea, the whole deal, and you can sometimes be under the spell of a virus without having full-blown flu symptoms.
Regardless, a lot of stress is incredibly fatiguing, and it sounds like you are under it. Take care of yourself.
Posted by TherapyGirl on March 27, 2008, at 20:17:26
In reply to I feel so tired and sick, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 10:38:09
I don't have any good answers for you, Dinah, but I do understand exactly what you're saying. Work tired and regular tired are two completely different things for me. It is exhausting to have to interact with so many people, all of whom have their own agendas, every single day for 5 days straight. I'm not helping, am I? But I totally understand. I hope it gets better.
Posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 20:41:32
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick, posted by Phillipa on March 27, 2008, at 12:07:25
There are probably reasons for both of us. It's just hard to "fix" those reasons. :(
Posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 20:45:24
In reply to ((Dinah)) » Dinah, posted by muffled on March 27, 2008, at 13:08:26
I've tried really hard to identify what might be affecting me. I make sure I have plenty of drinks and some snacks on hand. The air conditioner seems to be working a bit better.
But I think maybe I need to build some breaks into my schedule. To stand up and walk around, or stretch and bend. When Daddy worked there I often was interrupted and got up to do whatever he needed to have done. Maybe working steadily is like driving for long distances. Surprisingly tiring.
Posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 20:52:27
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick, posted by DAisym on March 27, 2008, at 14:58:26
I pretty much quit testing my blood sugars when my doctor said that as long as my quarterlies were fine I shouldn't worry too much about day to day readings. I probably got a bit annoyed at that response to my trying to do the right thing. :)
I did end up telling my therapist about my thoughts. He didn't take them that seriously either. He says that waking up to suicidal thoughts like that seems to be a typical expression of my feeling distressed or overwhelmed. Mind you, I expressed them in a merely factual manner. And said I was ignoring them because I didn't intend to act on them.
I'm sure if I had expressed them in a more distressed manner, he would have answered with less calm detachment. :)
I think I'm taking it reasonably well that he's going away. It really only affected one of my appointments, and he just moved that up one day. And he says I can call him if I need to, and that he really does mean that. (And he likely does today. He might not feel the same way when he's gone. lol.)
I even asked him if he was looking forward to getting away for a few days. And he looked at me with uncertainty before deciding it was safe to admit that he was very much looking forward to it. And I didn't even mind that response, or remind him that it wasn't terribly polite to tell one's work that he was anxious to get away from it.
Posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 20:56:22
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » Dinah, posted by raisinb on March 27, 2008, at 18:48:31
It feels like the sort of sick I feel when I haven't gotten enough sleep and am living on caffeine. Except that I've been sleeping plenty. Although I have been living on caffeine, so maybe it isn't a lack of sleep sick so much as a too much caffeine sick.
It always seems to me like I can either take care of myself or be productive. I can't seem to manage both together. :(
Posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 20:57:48
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » Dinah, posted by TherapyGirl on March 27, 2008, at 20:17:26
The nice thing is that my bosses are so happy I'm in the office that they haven't really been bothering me much.
Not sure how long that will last, but I'll enjoy it while it does.
I hope work gets better for you soon, too.
Posted by seldomseen on March 28, 2008, at 7:06:16
In reply to Re: ((Dinah)) » muffled, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 20:45:24
I'm a big home worker myself because I do a lot of writing. I'm not altogether happy about being at work, but sometimes it is unavoidable.
On days when I have to go into work there are some things that I do that help me to feel more like I am at home.
I keep a scented candle lit on my desk. Not one that is so obnoxious that it overwhelms my co-workers, but one that keeps my work area semlling good.
I bring a good lunch and actually take a lunch break OR I will treat myself to lunch out.
I invested in a good, comfortable desk chair. You would not believe how much fatigue a bad chair can cause.
I lose myself in my IPOD.
I don't know if any of these will help you. I think there is some merit in going into the office and leaving work there.
However, not all of us fit into the that mold.
I hope you feel better soon.
Seldom.
Posted by raisinb on March 28, 2008, at 8:39:35
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » raisinb, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 20:56:22
Too much caffeine always runs down my body because of the dehydration it causes. (I hated admitting this to myself, because I can give up just about anything except caffeine, but the skin problems, feeling shaky, etc. were too much. I settled for cutting back).
Posted by Dinah on March 28, 2008, at 13:05:26
In reply to Re: ((Dinah)) » Dinah, posted by seldomseen on March 28, 2008, at 7:06:16
I'm going to give it a good trial period, in the hopes that I can work out the problems. Or that part of the problem is the change itself and eventually I'll get used to it.
But after a suitable trial period, I'll give up if I need to.
I think I also need to recognize that part of how I take care of my family is doing the things during the day that need to be done. Like today I'm at home because I was waiting for the plumber. So of course I have to make up for that at other times, and that's part of doing what my husband can't do because he's at work.
I try to make my workspace pleasant. I arranged everything ergonomically. I make sure I have food and drink so my sugar levels don't dip too much, and I don't get too dehydrated. Since we moved down the hall a bit, I have the chance to turn the a/c all the way down without my older male employers getting too cold. And yes, I definitely make use of my iPod. It's a way to shut the world out a bit. My officemate is quiet and pleasant, but still present.
I definitely think my next move is to try to build in some activity. Maybe make things a bit less ergonomic, and move some of the stuff I use frequently to the other side of my rather large office, and up high on top of a shelf or low in a corner. Forced stretching. :)
Posted by Dinah on March 28, 2008, at 13:10:35
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » Dinah, posted by raisinb on March 28, 2008, at 8:39:35
I've been diagnosed with the nondiagnosis of idiopathic hypersomnia. A surprisingly large number of my aunts, uncles, and cousins have as well. They ruled out narcolepsy with a blood test. Diabetes also runs in my family, so extreme sensitivity to blood sugar levels might be involved.
I also am aware that I get sleepy when I get stressed or distressed. So being at the office definitely increases the sleepiness. And at home I can take a fifteen or twenty minute nap and refresh myself while that isn't really available at the office.
I'm definitely loading up on the caffeine to offset all that. Even with my provigil. I'm also trying to drink a lot, if only because my office gets rather hot. But perhaps dehydration is part of what's making me feel sick. I'll try to drink a bit more. If nothing else, the trips down the hall are good exercise. :)
Thanks.
Posted by Phillipa on March 28, 2008, at 20:10:51
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » raisinb, posted by Dinah on March 28, 2008, at 13:10:35
Dinah didn't know there was a blood test for narcolepsy. Very interesting. Love Phillipa and it sounds like you have a good plan.
Posted by Dinah on March 28, 2008, at 20:12:47
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » Dinah, posted by Phillipa on March 28, 2008, at 20:10:51
I think it was a genetic test. There's a gene marker or something. It doesn't 100% rule it out, but it almost rules it out.
Posted by Phillipa on March 28, 2008, at 21:24:11
In reply to Re: I feel so tired and sick » Phillipa, posted by Dinah on March 28, 2008, at 20:12:47
Dinah reminds of something like an ANA for autoimmune diseases. Love Phillipa
Posted by mair on March 28, 2008, at 22:26:54
In reply to I feel so tired and sick, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2008, at 10:38:09
Dinah -- I'd love to work more at home, mostly so I could avoid the phone calls from people who want stuff I haven't yet done. But I get so easily distracted at home. It's too easy to throw a load of laundry in or to start straightening up, or playing with my dog. And no matter how much thought I put into it, I never seem to come home with everything I need so I reach premature limit of what I can accomplish.
On the other hand, my work environment is very noisy. My secretary and another secretary in my area have unbelievably loud voices, as do a few others in my building and alot of the staff congregates around my secretary's desk which is just outside my office. I think maybe I'm more sensitive to noises than I used to be because I don't think it's that much noisier now than it has been for the 10 years of so that I've been in the same particular office, but it sure bothers me. I play the radio or I'll get radio stations on my computer and that helps a little. I've been thinking of getting one of those white noise machines, like my T has.
We have thermostat wars too, but I'm the one who's always cold - everyone else wants the AC on even when it's about 20 degrees outside. Unfortunately, my office gets the coldest.
Maybe when we don't like what we're doing, the environment is never going to be right.
I know this is a tough time for people in your line of work. I'm thinking about you.
mair
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