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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by sunnydays on October 7, 2006, at 21:11:16
I cried for the first time ever in therapy at my last session after almost 2 years of going there. My therapist was great. He didn't say anything while I was crying but he helped afterward. I kind of panicked after I realized I had been crying and started hyperventilating, but he basically ordered me to slow down my breathing and eventually I did (I did get awfully dizzy though). And he just talked and said comforting sorts of things. And the look on his face just looked like he was trying to hold back a smile, almost - really kind. He's been trying to get me to see that it's ok to feel feelings in therapy for a while, so I think he might have been kind of happy that I finally did. And it was really nice, although it was right at the end of the session, so it was awfully hard to leave. He gave me something from his office to hold onto over the week (he didn't say whether he wanted it back, but I assume he does). And that was so nice, because he knew that the weekend was going to be hard for me anyway for a number of reasons, and I've been keeping it in my pocket and it makes me feel like I know he still exists and I'll be okay.
So - thoughts, reactions, your own experiences about crying in therapy?
sunnydays
Posted by ClearSkies on October 7, 2006, at 23:20:27
In reply to crying in therapy, posted by sunnydays on October 7, 2006, at 21:11:16
My T tells me tears are of happiness,
the purge my soul
it clears my mindI howl as my heart is being broken,
Beat my breast
cover my eyes with hands,She just smiles and makes certain
the kleenex boxes arewithin reach,
She listens neutrally."What's the pain right now?"
I can't tell you
everything hurts the worse.
Posted by sleepygirl on October 8, 2006, at 0:42:43
In reply to crying in therapy, posted by sunnydays on October 7, 2006, at 21:11:16
it's good that you can do it....REALLY good
it took me a while
there was so much I couldn't talk about because so much made me want to cry
tis a natural thing though
gotta let it out sometimes
good for you :-)
Posted by Daisym on October 8, 2006, at 2:20:39
In reply to Re: crying in therapy » sunnydays, posted by sleepygirl on October 8, 2006, at 0:42:43
Sounds like a good session. I'm glad you were able to trust him so much.
I've gone from noticing that I cried to now noticing that I didn't. Sigh -- I think I owe him a box of tissues -- at the very least.
Posted by Lindenblüte on October 8, 2006, at 21:38:54
In reply to Re: crying in therapy » sleepygirl, posted by Daisym on October 8, 2006, at 2:20:39
sunnydays,
that sounds like a major accomplishment.i think your T's smile was a smile of satisfaction, because he knows that you have reached a new stage in your own self-awareness.
what a wonderful response from him, and what's even more wonderful is YOUR response- you realize that it is a positive thing, even though it's so difficult and hurts so bad.
I often have a little trickle here and there, but the one time i broke down and couldn't stop the tears was the first time i reached for a kleenex.
as it turns out, there was only one in the box. i said "oh my GOD the irony!" kind of laughing at myself, and the situation, even in the middle of telling this horrible gut-wrenching story. my T pretty much jumped out of his chair, and was back with a brand new box in about 3 seconds. never seen him move so fast. and when he came back, he was still intense, and had my last thought in his head and reminded me of it.
those T's... man, they really know what they're doing! (well, when I understand what they're doing, anyways...!)
pats on the back,
-Li
Posted by Phillipa on October 8, 2006, at 21:43:52
In reply to Re: crying in therapy, posted by Lindenblüte on October 8, 2006, at 21:38:54
That's it tomorrow have to call the therapist and make an appointment can't go on like this. The answer is not just in pills but letting all the hurts of a lifetime out. I e-mailed my ex-husband father of my kids and told him how I wished we could share fond memories into old age. My husband knows I did this and is behind me. He won't respond but I said I love you and always will. Won't have it on me if something happens to him that I never said it after divorce. Love Phillipa ps I hate noone
Posted by sunnydays on October 8, 2006, at 22:19:22
In reply to crying in therapy, posted by sunnydays on October 7, 2006, at 21:11:16
Thanks everyone. I'll post individual replies later. I really appreciate everyone's thoughts, I just don't feel well today (it's cold season alright, second one in a month) and I have a busy week coming up. But I promise I'll reply.
sunnydays
Posted by muffled on October 11, 2006, at 22:03:32
In reply to crying in therapy, posted by sunnydays on October 7, 2006, at 21:11:16
Thats SO cool SD!
I'm happy for you. Your T sounds nice.
Dunno WHAT my T would do if I cried? Proly she'd cry too!!!
Dunno though.
I don't do emotions in T either, except ANXIETY!!!!!!LOL!
Good on you SD!
Muffled
Posted by muffled on October 11, 2006, at 22:08:09
In reply to Re: crying in therapy, posted by sunnydays on October 8, 2006, at 22:19:22
Posted by kerria on October 12, 2006, at 0:26:35
In reply to crying in therapy, posted by sunnydays on October 7, 2006, at 21:11:16
i always cry at t- mostly the whole time unless the parts that don't cry come out for some reason-mostly T sits there- Never says anything comforting. It feels so terrible to cry in front of someone who never comforts. It makes the world there feel like a very uncaring place.
Do you feel like going to t is like 'leaving the world' kind of- like it has nothing to do with real life?
i wish my T would say something to comfort- therapy feels so hopeless and sad when you cry and T has no response that you can hear or see.
i'm also no better for years. i need another T- so tired of just pouring my tears over that same couch and rug and leaving t in worse shape than i came all the time.
kerria
Posted by shrinking violet on October 12, 2006, at 12:23:14
In reply to Re: crying in therapy » sleepygirl, posted by Daisym on October 8, 2006, at 2:20:39
Good for you!
I remember the first time I cried with ANYONE...it just happened to be with my first and former T. I had been seeing her for about seven months or so. One session I realized I couldn't hold it back. I was angry at myself and felt like a total idiot. She told me it was the best gift I could have given her. I remember she came over and offered me a tissue. Afterwards, when it was clear I couldn't stop and was very uncomfortable, we ended the session a few minutes early. She came over then and asked me to give her a hug, which I did, and proceeded to bawl like a baby in her arms. She held me, and her words were very comforting. I'll probably never forget it.
Posted by muffled on October 12, 2006, at 12:58:30
In reply to Re: crying in therapy » sunnydays, posted by kerria on October 12, 2006, at 0:26:35
> i always cry at t- mostly the whole time unless the parts that don't cry come out for some reason-mostly T sits there- Never says anything comforting. It feels so terrible to cry in front of someone who never comforts. It makes the world there feel like a very uncaring place.
>
> Do you feel like going to t is like 'leaving the world' kind of- like it has nothing to do with real life?
>
> i wish my T would say something to comfort- therapy feels so hopeless and sad when you cry and T has no response that you can hear or see.
>
> i'm also no better for years. i need another T- so tired of just pouring my tears over that same couch and rug and leaving t in worse shape than i came all the time.
> kerria***Kerria, any chance you could have a calm part take this very post into your T?
So he can read it?
If he don't respond well, mebbe it IS time to start T hunting.
I know its not easy for DID people to find a good T, but they are out there....somewhere.
Take care,
Muffled
Posted by muffled on October 12, 2006, at 12:59:39
In reply to Re: crying in therapy » sunnydays, posted by kerria on October 12, 2006, at 0:26:35
Posted by muffled on October 12, 2006, at 13:00:46
In reply to crying in therapy, posted by sunnydays on October 7, 2006, at 21:11:16
Posted by kerria on October 15, 2006, at 0:38:33
In reply to Re: crying in therapy » kerria, posted by muffled on October 12, 2006, at 12:58:30
Thank you Muffled.
My T would be defensive if i did that- he would pretend like he would change but he wouldn't. i know he would say, "Don't you remember when...?"
yes- i do need to find another T i think, i'm so overwhelmed now- T knows my parts, no one else does and i'm too much of a mess to change now- Unless there were someone who would make it easier somehow i can't go through the motions needed to change Ts now.
i'm worried that it will always be this way and i'll never change. and that T will push me over the edge someday.
Safe hugs,
kerria
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