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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by danish on September 23, 2005, at 21:06:17
I recently told my therapist details about being "taking advantage of" by two guys when I was younger. I had told her what happened before, but this time I told her most of the details. Now, I feel like sh*t. I feel sick to my stomach and I also feel like I have been in a trance since we spoke. It was kind of weird because I feel like I was boring her during my explanation. I guess I was just hoping to elicit some sort of response from her. It was as if I was saying "hey, i am in a ton of pain here and need some reassurance" and she was like "yea, I hear about this stuff all the time." Is that normal, are they suppose to keep a straight face while you pour your heart out?
Posted by gardenergirl on September 23, 2005, at 23:41:46
In reply to Recent disclosure...., posted by danish on September 23, 2005, at 21:06:17
Oh dear, that sounds like a very hard session. As far as your T's reaction...well...it varies depending on their orientation. And also depending on their unique characteristics and experience.
It sounds like it was very hard for you to disclose that, and you were needing something from your T that you didn't get. I know that hurts, and your reaction might be a way for you to dissociate yourself from that in order to keep it together.
And the standard advice applies here...talk to her about it at your next session. Try to talk about what it felt like to tell her that and how her reaction appeared to you.
((((danish)))) --safe cyber hugs
Take extra gentle care.
gg
Posted by ButterflyHigh on September 24, 2005, at 1:55:39
In reply to Recent disclosure...., posted by danish on September 23, 2005, at 21:06:17
Oh wow - my heart goes out to you! I understand so much what you're experiencing, and I'm so sorry for it. My t keeps a straight face when I tell her things like that, but I hear you it makes me wonder if they are just sick of hearing similar things among clients. I do not, in any way or circumstance feel your t should have remarked, "yea, I hear about this stuff all the time" that is rude! I can only imagine a client feeling so not validated after hearing that - seriously. It's like saying to you, "ok - so you're not normal, what can I do for you?" Argghh that irates me, but I'll get over it lol
What kind of response from her were you wanting or expecting? I would suggest instead of assuming your therapist knows what you are needing from her, tell her what you wrote here, but remember, reassurance isn't always a good thing, it comes from within, not another human being, trust me, been there, still there ;)
Take good care of you :)
Posted by danish on September 24, 2005, at 6:23:42
In reply to Re: Recent disclosure.... » danish, posted by ButterflyHigh on September 24, 2005, at 1:55:39
I guess the response I was hoping for would have included things like what she has said to me before all the detail. Like..."if guys don't know how to use it, they should lose it" or "that makes me upset" or "i am kind of pissed about that." Do you think I should just come out and ask her what her response it to the stuff I told her?? Either way, whatever happened in our last session has changed our relationship as the therapist-client. I never told anyone about what happened and it's has been almost 6 years. I am concerned about what is going to happen next.
Posted by ButterflyHigh on September 24, 2005, at 11:12:16
In reply to Re: Recent disclosure...., posted by danish on September 24, 2005, at 6:23:42
So, she said all those things before you told her about your experiences? That's odd, maybe she is gay? Seriously, my therapist bashes men a lot, I don't know why though. Yes, I do think you should just come out and ask her what her response is to the stuff you told her. Through the years of all the therapy I have had, you only get what, about 50 minutes, so take advantage of that--for you! Please try hard not to be concerned about what is going to happen next, that is your therapist's job. I would mention it to your therapist just how you put it here, it's a risk - but one that may be definately worth taking.
Take care of you :)
Posted by danish on September 24, 2005, at 16:10:46
In reply to Re: Recent disclosure.... » danish, posted by ButterflyHigh on September 24, 2005, at 11:12:16
I told her what happened to me a few weeks ago, I just never told her any details of what happeneed. I wasn't nearly ready for that, but I do hope I was ready last week, cause that is when she found out. By her saying those things to me, it just helped me realize that is wasn't my fault, so I really appreciate feedback like that.
Posted by ButterflyHigh on September 24, 2005, at 20:57:03
In reply to Re: Recent disclosure.... » ButterflyHigh, posted by danish on September 24, 2005, at 16:10:46
>helped me realize that is wasn't my fault,
BINGO :)
>so I really appreciate feedback like that.
Trust the process, all the best
Posted by danish on September 27, 2005, at 10:54:05
In reply to Re: Recent disclosure.... » danish, posted by ButterflyHigh on September 24, 2005, at 20:57:03
I knew I only had 8 more sessions with my therapist, but I still told her those things. (She is my school therapist and those are the rules.) I guess it kind of just hit me that we have 5 more sessions left and felt like a wave of anger and depression just flew over me. I think I need to vent to someone...She is just like the rest of them. I finally feel somewhat safe and she is going to be leaving. I know she can't do anything about it, it is just the way I feel. This always happens and I never learn. AHHHH!!!
This is the end of the thread.
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