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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Pandabear on April 25, 2004, at 16:54:31
Last Thursday, I went to my session with my therapist who hit on an issue of mine that is quite disturbing for me. It is something that I was going to talk about when I felt I was ready to..yet she beat me to it and brought it up before I did. Now, it is like my whole world is changing and I am losing control of what I thought I was in control of. My therapist is not going to let me not talk about it, which is fine but I am finding myself becoming really depressed and I am isolating myself from the rest of my family and friends. I Know it has only been a few days since I saw her but since then, I am not in contact with my family, and I have spent my weekend very down..today I watched tv all day and im just really depressed. This past Fri. Evening I ended up getting really emotional and started telling my mom that I didnt want anyone to touch me or talk to me or hurt me and that i just wanted to be left alone. I know that when I go to talk to my therapist this week im going to tell her the same, yet she is not going to let it go. I just wish I could rewind and everything would be fine. I hate my life right now. I hate it that I feel like im not in control. My therapists are in control because they have my best interest in mind, but I dont want to deal with what they want me to and im scared. I dont know what to do. Sorry if I sound like a baby..but im really scared. I feel traped like I cannot escape...
Posted by gardenergirl on April 25, 2004, at 22:51:17
In reply to feeling depressed, posted by Pandabear on April 25, 2004, at 16:54:31
Pandabear,
I'm so sorry that you are hurting right now. Perhaps it's best that you set boundaries like you did with your mom. Maybe you need to protect yourself a bit more while you are feeling so vulnerable.Is there any way that you dropped a clue to your T that maybe you were ready to talk about this subject and she picked up on it? Also, do you really have to talk about it if you are not ready? Perhaps you can talk with your T about not being ready yet, how scared you are, and what feeling ready might feel like.
I hope your next session is helpful to you. In the meantime, please take extra special care of yourself. And post if you feel like it. Maybe have a cup of soothing tea? (one hint: chai latte made with milk you make from nonfat milk powder is really gross! Not worth the effort. Got to get to the store!!!)
Hope that made you smile!
(((((PandaBear)))))
gg
Posted by fallsfall on April 25, 2004, at 23:03:37
In reply to feeling depressed, posted by Pandabear on April 25, 2004, at 16:54:31
Therapy can bring pretty scary things up, can't it?
Therapists like to make it hard for you to avoid hard issues. But it is usually unproductive to talk about something before you are ready to. You need to be sure to tell her how much this has upset you. I'm sure that she doesn't want to push you too hard. If Monday is still this hard, you could give her a call and just tell her that it is upsetting you a lot, and ask for reassurance that she won't push too hard.
I can really relate to wanting to feel like you are in control. That is a huge issue for me. I bet that you have more control than you think.
Good luck.
Posted by shadows721 on April 25, 2004, at 23:07:55
In reply to feeling depressed, posted by Pandabear on April 25, 2004, at 16:54:31
Panda,
You don't have to talk about a topic until you are ready. You are paying the t. It isn't the other way around here. You are handling this ship. If it steers in a direction you aren't ready for, steer it in another direction. You can tell the t how much this is depressing you.
Posted by antigua on April 26, 2004, at 8:37:32
In reply to feeling depressed, posted by Pandabear on April 25, 2004, at 16:54:31
Try to go slow and trust yourself. I forget--do you trust your T completely? If you do, just let her (or him) know that while you accept that the topic has been brought up, you need plenty of reassurance and comfort before you can move forward. You need to know that they will be there for you, and if you do trust them you will feel comfortable enough to open up. If you don't, just take baby steps. Just the realization can be enough to send you (me!) into a tailspin, but once that passes the intensity hopefully lessens.
Take care of yourself. And don't be too hard on yourself either. You will open up when you are ready.
Take care,
antigua
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