![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 25 of 53. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 13:09:37
I call this meeting of PTPC to order!
It's so nice to find out that I'm not the only one who researches what my therapist is trying to do and how I should be acting.
I will have to get "In Session" once I finish two books she recommended to me (non therapy related.) I wouldn't want her to think that I didn't like the books, so I didn't finish them. We like the same books, isn't that just perfect? I am so pathetic.
Poet
Posted by Tabitha on October 29, 2003, at 16:26:10
In reply to Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 13:09:37
I don't think I'm eligible for that club. I've been fighting tooth and nail much of the time. There were some brief honeymoons, followed by major disillusionments, followed by reconciliations. Maybe I could get into the Long Term Therapy Tolerator Club. I'd use the word Survivor but it's so cliche.
Posted by DaisyM on October 29, 2003, at 16:37:34
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Tabitha on October 29, 2003, at 16:26:10
We'll need a list of rules -- or at least interpretations of those that break the rules. As in:
Being on time - What does too early or too late mean?
Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? If so, what does that mean?
What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!
What else?
Posted by fallsfall on October 29, 2003, at 16:48:01
In reply to Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 13:09:37
I've told my therapist the first time I saw him that I read Psychology books. He suggested "The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression". Which is a good overview of depression and treatments, and what it feels like. But, I knew all that stuff 8 years ago.
Then he was going on vacation and I asked for reading suggestions (so I could feel a connection to him while he was gone). He gave me the name of one book that I couldn't even find in the Library of Congress, and told me to read anything by Eric Erickson. I did read some, and it was interesting, but it wasn't "how therapy is done".
Last session I said again something about reading. He asked what I was reading. I told him that I read two kinds of books:
1. Comfort books for me are books for therapy patients about how therapy works (like "In Session") and books with case histories
2. Books written for therapists (the night before I had been reading "Psychodynamic Psychotherapy of Borderline Patients" by Kernberg.)
He said a couple of times that he was impressed that I could get through Kernberg. But I think that he doesn't think that I am terribly Borderline because he really wasn't sure that that book would help me with what we were doing. Finally he seemed to understand that I was going to read no matter what, and that he had the opportunity to steer me towards relevant books if he wanted. Otherwise, I would read whatever I could find. So he told me to read Kohut, "The Restoration of the Self". This is Psychology of the Self. I hadn't read any of that before, but it really makes a lot of sense. Finally he has figured out what I'm looking for.
I think that he doesn't want me reading, but realizes that I'm going to. It's a defense for me. It lets me feel like I'm figuring out how to be a perfect patient. Also, I read more when I'm not as confident that my therapist knows what to do - so that I can figure out what to tell them that will put them on the right track - or so I can figure out the problem myself. Thank goodness I have a card for a university library!
I raise your patheticness by a university library card!
Posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 18:39:46
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club » Poet, posted by fallsfall on October 29, 2003, at 16:48:01
Maybe the club members should get together and write our own book. Compile experiences of therapy from the patient's perspective.
We could call it Therapy Patient Babble.
I so need something published to enhance my crappy writing portfolio. Oh, wait, it's perfect as is that's why no one will hire me, I'm too good.
Poet
Posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 19:15:12
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by DaisyM on October 29, 2003, at 16:37:34
> We'll need a list of rules -- or at least interpretations of those that break the rules. As in:
> Being on time - What does too early or too late mean?
I'm always on time, my therapist is always late. What does THAT mean? Unless traffic was good or bad I think too early means you're an over achiever at trying to be perfect and too late means you're not being perfect, the perfect patient never keeps his/her therapist waiting.
> Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? If so, what does that mean?
I never wear the same outfit twice in a month. I hope it means that I don't just throw any old thing on for our appointments.
>What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!
I vote for chocolate chip cookies.
>What else?How many times is sneaking a glance at the clock or your watch allowable per session?
What about note taking? In order to be perfect I would like to get it down right away and not wait until I get home. (Yes, I really do that- see I'm ready to write that book on therapy.)
Poet
Posted by Dinah on October 29, 2003, at 20:03:43
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 19:15:12
I'm not sure I want to belong. I'm holding out for my therapist to decide to head the Perfect Therapy Therapist Club. Hey! It's their job! And I don't mind helping him get better at it.
> > We'll need a list of rules -- or at least interpretations of those that break the rules. As in:
>
> > Being on time - What does too early or too late mean?Being too early means you'll never have your session cut short. My therapist always runs late. In fact I'm pretty sure he thinks the session starts at ten after. But if I'm not there for ten minutes after the start of session, he can legitimately cut my session short. So I'm always five or so minutes early. If I'm earlier than that I wait in the car.
>
> > Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? If so, what does that mean?
>
I dress oddly. In comfortable clothes, and in my most natural style, which can be seen as odd. He has addressed my appearance from time to time. And I think he reads more into how I dress than it really means. I think he is particularly offended by my braids (or since I got my hair cut, my two inch long ponytails).I do generally bathe, and don't go in if my hair hasn't been washed in a long time. That's more than I do sometimes in real life, so he can't use my hygiene as a mood barometer as much as I do.
> >What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!
>
Ugh, who can eat. I fall asleep. My hope is to make it home before I fall asleep. I do think that falling asleep while driving would qualify me as a bad therapy client in my therapist's eyes.> How many times is sneaking a glance at the clock or your watch allowable per session?
>
I usually glance whenever I open a new topic. It only makes sense. He keeps his clock politely open to view. And I have to keep an eye on him so that there isn't therapy session shortening crawl. If I let him get away with it, our sessions would only be forty minutes I think. He uses me to catch up time on!!!!I think mine just wants me to be totally honest with him about what I'm thinking, and not obsess too much on termination. And not self injure. And be productive at work. And pay his bill. As long as I do that, he's ok with the rest.
Posted by fallsfall on October 29, 2003, at 21:34:22
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 19:15:12
> > We'll need a list of rules -- or at least interpretations of those that break the rules. As in:
>
> > Being on time - What does too early or too late mean?
>
I like to be 10 minutes early. With my old therapist, that gave me time to read through my journalling so I would know what I was supposed to be talking about. With my new one it lets me catch my breath after huffing and puffing up the stairs, have time to write a check, and breathe deeply a little. I'll wait in my car if I'm earlier than that. Once in a great while I'll get stuck by a train or construction. If I didn't have that 10 minute window I would PANIC.
>
> > Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? If so, what does that mean?
>
I wear blue jeans, old T shirts (no bra) and sandels. When there is snow on the ground I'll have to wear real shoes. I don't do laundry very often, (I'm embarassed to say this...) I try to be sure that I'm not wearing the same shirt two times in a row. There have been times when I haven't washed my hair just because I didn't want him (or even more, her) to think I was doing better.
>
> >What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!
>
Ice cream. If I still feel lousy after that, then I'll nap. If I feel better, I like to swing on swings while I think and process the session.
>
> >What else?
>
> How many times is sneaking a glance at the clock or your watch allowable per session?
>
His clock is usually facing so I can't see it. We are having a little "discussion" about that. I want him to wind down a little before he shoves me out the door. I think he wants me to take responsibility for that. I usually do short topics at the beginning and am into something long at the end, so I don't have to decide whether we have time to talk about something new. I planned my sessions more with my old therapist, so I'd check the clock to make sure I'd have time to get everything in. With him I go with the flow more. I HATE looking at my watch, because I don't think I can do that without him noticing, and I don't want him to know I'm watching the clock.> What about note taking? In order to be perfect I would like to get it down right away and not wait until I get home. (Yes, I really do that- see I'm ready to write that book on therapy.)
>
If I took notes I would not be "present" at all. With my old therapist we talked about taking notes or taping the sessions, because I couldn't remember what we had said. The tape recorder didn't work because we were too far apart. Taking notes would be much to distracting for me.New questions:
How often is it "OK" to call your therapist, After hours? During business hours?
Does your therapist ever make mistakes? What was the worst one? Did you tell them?
Are you jealous of their other clients?
Have you searched on the internet for them (my personal favorite)? Driven past their house? Do you know what kind of car they drive? Do you know the car's license number?
What DO they want from us???????
Posted by Dinah on October 29, 2003, at 21:48:03
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by fallsfall on October 29, 2003, at 21:34:22
> New questions:
>
> How often is it "OK" to call your therapist, After hours? During business hours?Each therapist seems to have their own ideas about that. I think we should probably listen to them and respect their individual boundaries, but not try to guess where the boundaries are and set our own smaller ones. (Easier said than done, I know.) That being said, I can count on one hand with fingers left over my calls after six or before eight or on weekends. I had a Babble meltdown one Saturday night and called him and he wasn't at all upset.
>
> Does your therapist ever make mistakes? What was the worst one? Did you tell them?
>
All the time. None that I would consider a "worst" mistake. The one that set him back farthest with me was someone else's mistake. My old pdoc had a big mouth and told me more than I needed to know in a not good way.> Are you jealous of their other clients?
>
Other clients? He has other clients? :D Nope. I'm sure there are some he has more fun with, or that he has more in common with than me, or respects more than me, or likes more than me. And as long as he's his usual self with me, it doesn't matter to me.> Have you searched on the internet for them (my personal favorite)? Driven past their house? Do you know what kind of car they drive? Do you know the car's license number?
Yes to all. I've told him. And the car stuff is self preservation. We live too close to one another. I need to know what kind of car he drives to avoid running into him in the stores we both frequent. Now that's the subject of our next session. :D
>
> What DO they want from us???????Ask. And believe the answer. And tell them what you want from them too. And accept that you might not get the answer you want. The therapy relationship is supposed to be, in some ways, a practice for other relationships. Being open is a good relationship skill.
Posted by DaisyM on October 29, 2003, at 22:56:09
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Dinah on October 29, 2003, at 21:48:03
New questions:
>
> How often is it "OK" to call your therapist, After hours? During business hours?He says "call me when you need me." I think they know when a crisis is brewing. I'd say, not on their vacation. And probably not religious holidays. (Do you know their religious affiliation?)
>
> Does your therapist ever make mistakes? What was the worst one? Did you tell them?
>
Only one but my experience is short. He missed a cue to ask a key question and I was REALLY upset because I didn't want to "volunteer" it...it was however, among the most powerful discussions we've had. When I was interviewing therapists to get started, one wanted to hold hands with me and do this whole "intimate" exercise about how I need to trust people. Watch me RUN from her office!!!> Are you jealous of their other clients?
>
Never. But I am curious about his caseload.> Have you searched on the internet for them (my personal favorite)? Driven past their house? Do you know what kind of car they drive? Do you know the car's license number?
Yes to the internet. No to the rest.
>
> What DO they want from us???????
I think they want us to trust them to help us get better.Another question:
What are their therapy experiences? How do they view us? And, do we really want to know?
Posted by DaisyM on October 29, 2003, at 23:01:27
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club » Poet, posted by fallsfall on October 29, 2003, at 16:48:01
I finished Undercurrents today. I saw myself until she had ECT. I want to mail this book to my whole family and give it to my Therapist to say are you trying to understand me right now? Read this!
Posted by Medusa on October 30, 2003, at 2:35:07
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by fallsfall on October 29, 2003, at 21:34:22
> Being on time - What does too early or too late mean?
>Late could be wanting special attention / exceptions to the limitations on the therapist's time, wanting to be at a higher priority level than other patients (or the therapist).
How early? An hour early might mean anxiety about getting there on time. Camping overnight might mean something else. Especially if you camp under the therapist's car.
> Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? >If so, what does that mean?Oh yeah. I try not to repeat too much, but I never had a lot of clothes. Weekly "talk therapy" is tough in this respect. Systemic therapy is less frequent, but I still wore the same top for both of the two sessions I've so far had with current therapist. Someone in her team is sure to have noticed, because they view the videos of the sessions together afterwards. I could have fun with this ...
I don't think that most therapists really notice. Once I accidentally had a plaid scarf and a plaid bag (different plaids) and the therapist remarked "that's a lot of plaid". Well stfu lady that was not a productive comment.
New question: what does the therapist's attire mean?
>What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!
Protein. A big juicy hamburger with toppings to suit the mood is ideal.
> How many times is sneaking a glance at the clock or your watch allowable per session?Keep the clock in view and a constant eye on it.
> What about note taking?No, because I prefer :
> taping the sessions
This was very useful when writing a complaint letter to a screwy systems therapist who tried to take me out of the queue for the sessions I'm now in. I played parts of the cassette for the lawyer (okay, a personal friend who's a lawyer) who helped me write the letter. HA HA HA, GOTCHA you idiot! Then I faxed the letter to the institute several days before she would be there. It contained detailed descriptions of a few personal mistakes she'd made, including exact quotes. And she knew I'd taped the session.
> How often is it "OK" to call your therapist,Only when one knows for sure that only an answering machine will pick up, and leave specific availability info so the shrink can call back.
I never called a talk therapist. I first called a therapist when I saw a systems person ... left a message with one specific question about the homework she'd assigned, and she called back and basically gave me 40 minutes therapy / constructive explanation on the phone. Her sessions were expensive enough that I didn't mind. She also gave me her home number and said I could always call between noon and two.
> Does your therapist ever make mistakes? What was the worst one? Did you tell them?
>Oh, sure. I've had too many therapists, maybe I should go through and add a "worst mistake" column to my Ho-list, and have a line-up of each one's worst mistake.
I'd buy tickets to a dog-and-pony show featuring the therapists I've been through ...
New question: when you've told the therapist about her/his mistakes, how have they responded? What's the Perfect Therapist response?
> Are you jealous of their other clients?No, only irked when the therapist expects me to understand them running over because they're "complicated" or "in more pain" or something. My time is just as valuable as their's is!
> Have you searched on the internet for them (my personal favorite)? Driven past their house? Do you know what kind of car they drive? Do you know the car's license number?
>Wow, this is very committed. I should do this more - once I had a consultation with a psychiatry professor, and had I looked her up beforehand, I'd have known what books she'd written, and could have gotten lots more from the session. She referred me to a TOTAL dud therapist.
> What DO they want from us???????
>Money, honey. Especially if they hear that a family business is involved, they wanna piece o' the action. Maybe that's more true in this economy. I dunno what's with regular therapists wanting this - there are therapists and consultants who are specialists in family business and have written books and done lots of research, so why does Joe/Jane Shrink think anyone would be dumb enough to engage her/him?
For talk therapists who are paid by insurance, they just want to get through their day and have none of their patients die or pull anything weird that would require extra effort from the therapist.
New question: what about therapy in a non-native language - for either you or the therapist?
New question: for other therapy HOs, what patterns have you noticed/reactions have you gotten from many, most or all of your therapists?
Posted by fallsfall on October 30, 2003, at 7:24:07
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Medusa on October 30, 2003, at 2:35:07
??How often is it "OK" to call your therapist, After hours? During business hours?
I would have to be in really bad shape to call outside of business hours. I don't feel too bad about calling about easy things (what was the name of the author he suggested? When is my next appointment?) during business hours, but I think that I could get into that too much and use it as an excuse to hear his voice and know that he had to think about me. Calling with a crisis during business hours is OK.
??Does your therapist ever make mistakes? What was the worst one? Did you tell them? when you've told the therapist about her/his mistakes, how have they responded? What's the Perfect Therapist response?
My old one used to, and apologized for them - in general she didn't seem too guilty (which made it easier for me). I would sometimes tell her about mistakes in my journalling - that way we didn't talk about it outloud (unless it was a significant mistake that she would then apologize for). I'm not sure new therapist makes mistakes...
??Are you jealous of their other clients?
I would like to be important enough to have a set time. He fits me in - at least now we have settled (pretty much) on what days, so I can schedule other things. I think that I'm still his newest client.
??Have you searched on the internet for them (my personal favorite)? Driven past their house? Do you know what kind of car they drive? Do you know the car's license number?
Yes, No, I used to know her car & license number. Now I don't know what either of them drive.
??What DO they want from us???????
I still haven't a clue. They want us to cry???
??Do you know their religious affiliation?
She is jewish. I don't know about him. [Why am I answering these questions for both of them? I haven't seen her in 4 months.]
??What are their therapy experiences?
No idea. Except I'm pretty sure that his training would have required him to do some analysis.
??How do they view us? And, do we really want to know?
I only want to know if they think I am interesting and working hard.
??what does the therapist's attire mean?
She had a great wardrobe. Almost as many pairs of shoes as outfits. 8 1/2 years about once a week and I was never aware of a favorite outfit.
He needs a fashion consultant.
??what about therapy in a non-native language - for either you or the therapist?
It is hard enough in a native language. I can't imagine...
??for other therapy HOs, what patterns have you noticed/reactions have you gotten from many, most or all of your therapists?
Not sure what the question is.
Posted by Dinah on October 30, 2003, at 7:45:05
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Medusa on October 30, 2003, at 2:35:07
I'm impressed, Medusa. :) You're even more cynical about your therapist(s) than I am. I agree about the money. I think he'd rather I not be too much bother, but I think the money is his major motivation/concern. And since mine seems to shorten sessions by starting late and ending less late, I don't feel too guilty about calling him.
Hmmm. Admittedly, he is also more willing than I am to let a session run overtime if he thinks what we're talking about is important. So maybe I should consider the session shortening as a reverse phenomenon, and consider what he might find unimportant about them.
Ok, I have another therapist/client question. If your therapist does things that are to your understanding outside the acceptable public range, such as pick his nose or chew at something stuck under his fingernail. Under those circumstances. First, should you interpret it as an expression of his contempt for you, and second, what on earth do you do. I mean, I like doing sessions with my eyes closed, but I also like to glance at him from time to time and it's hard to do that when you're afraid to see something that it's more polite not to notice.
Posted by deirdrehbrt on October 30, 2003, at 11:57:24
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by DaisyM on October 29, 2003, at 16:37:34
Ok, I never thought that I could be in a perfect patient club.... I'm too far from perfect. I cause my therapist distress at times. I fooled her for over a year, thinking there was nothing wrong with me. Today, she got most of the way to her office, and then went home to type a letter that she had forgotten for me. How can I possibly be a perfect patient?
Then, you kind and goodly people show me that the meaning of a perfect patient isn't one that merely behaves according to some set of rules, but rather is a patient who gets what she needs without the therapist suggesting you find another more suitable practicioner.
So, without objections, I submit my request for entrance into your fine club.Being on time - What does too early or too late mean? Funny question.... Today, my therapist was early, and I was early, and we started the session 15 minutes early. Of course, we left after an hour, but it was a full hour, of therapy.
Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? If so, what does that mean?
Generally, I like to wear clothes; preferably clean ones. Some times this is more difficult than others. I do like to shower before the session too.What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!
Today was Chocolate striped shortbread cookies and milk.Thanks all,
Dee.
Posted by bubblechild on October 30, 2003, at 16:56:03
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by fallsfall on October 30, 2003, at 7:24:07
Being on time - What does too early or too late mean?
I always struggle with this. I like the five minute rule. My T doesn't even take me until 15 minutes after my apt. time. I always wonder what she does with that time. Does she try to remember who I am? Does she reread my file,thinking to herself "what a boring hour this will be", does she gossip with her coworkers?> > Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? If so, what does that mean?
Yeah, sadly I am guilty of this too. Since I go after work, I sometimes wonder if my coworkers notice that once a week I look better!> >What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!
Sorry I like a nice glass of wine.
> How many times is sneaking a glance at the clock or your watch allowable per session?
The only clock I can ever see is the one she says is not really for patients (what ever that means!). So I never know why it faces me!
> How often is it "OK" to call your therapist, After hours? During business hours?
I can't even imagine doing this though I read how so many of you feel free to do so. I have never been offered the option and would be afraid of overstepping my boundaries!
> Have you searched on the internet for them (my personal favorite)? Driven past their house? Do you know what kind of car they drive? Do you know the car's license number?
Internet...guilty. I even found her husband (different last name) and know what he does. Have driven past where she lives....on my way somewhere and "happened to be in the neighborhood" lol.
How do they view us? And, do we really want to know?
If I only knew that I might feel a bit more relaxed. I also think she'll be happy if I work hard. I have the feeling she might like to see me cry.....UGH
Posted by Dinah on October 30, 2003, at 18:36:02
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club » Medusa, posted by Dinah on October 30, 2003, at 7:45:05
Alas, I am alone in my quandary!
Posted by DaisyM on October 30, 2003, at 19:48:54
In reply to No one's therapist picks his nose?, posted by Dinah on October 30, 2003, at 18:36:02
I can't imagine doing my session with my eyes closed though there are times that i keep my eyes averted. His eyes are among the nicest things about him. And nope, no nose picking.
Another new question for the club: How do you answer - Where did you just go?
or What were the tears (or almost tears) for?
Posted by Dinah on October 31, 2003, at 6:56:54
In reply to Re: No one's therapist picks his nose? » Dinah, posted by DaisyM on October 30, 2003, at 19:48:54
You mean going through therapy with your eyes closed is unusual? No wonder my therapist keeps prodding me to open them when he gets a chance.
Keeping my eyes closed lets me concentrate better on both what I'm feeling (which has been a problem for me to identify sometimes) and on the feeling of the "space" between us.
I am always at something of a loss to answer those questions, too. But I like them better than "If your tears could talk, what would they tell you?" I always want to answer that they ask me where on earth he gets these stupid questions.
Posted by kitkat33 on October 31, 2003, at 9:41:34
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by DaisyM on October 29, 2003, at 16:37:34
> Being on time - What does too early or too late mean?I am always right on time, If I am early I wait in my car until it's about a couple of minutes to the appointment time. She ends on time and starts exactly on time too.
> Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? If so, what does that mean?I wear what I wear to work, but alot of times I can't remember what she wears, so I spend time trying to remember to look and try to remember her clothes. I generally wear the same skirt each week with different tops and sweaters.
> What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!If it's emotional- Fast food comfort in FF. Ugh!!!
> What else?I look at the clock anytime I get nervous. I say the same thing each time I start, She asks how was my week and I say it was OK.
Kit
Posted by DaisyM on October 31, 2003, at 10:19:12
In reply to Re: Eyes closed, posted by Dinah on October 31, 2003, at 6:56:54
I love reading these posts...I'm laughing myself silly. This has been such a hard week, I needed these laughs.
See new thread below for more club questions.
Posted by stjames on October 31, 2003, at 15:48:13
In reply to Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 13:09:37
> I call this meeting of PTPC to order!
>
> It's so nice to find out that I'm not the only one who researches what my therapist is trying to do and how I should be acting.I though to idea of thearpy was to be real and no to "act" ?
Posted by karen_kay on October 31, 2003, at 16:53:31
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 19:15:12
> > Being on time - What does too early or too late mean?
> I am always 10 -15 minutes early to show that I am just as professional as he is. Too early means you are too eager. Too late means you are disrespectful.> > Dressing for the visit: Do you think about it? If so, what does that mean?
>Of course I think about what to wear!! I change my clothes at least 3 times before I go! I always dress in something nice, usually a nice shirt and dress pants, to show him that we are on the same level. Never wear the same clothes in the same month! Soemtimes I dress nicer than he does and he comments on it. I like that!
> >What foods are we endorsing for post-therapy consolation: (I vote for cream of wheat :)!
>Mac and cheese
> >What else?
>
> How many times is sneaking a glance at the clock or your watch allowable per session?
> Depends on if he is annoying me or asking hard questions!
> What about note taking? In order to be perfect I always have my journal. If he assigns homework I write it down. If he says something provoking, I write it down. If he gets long-winded, I doodle. He never writes anyhting down. I am jealous of his memory.
>
> Poet
>
> I really like this thread. I know I am very jealous of his other clients. I told him one time that I prefer to think that he doesn't have any other clients. He laughed. I didn't. One time after I left he went to get another client and I was paying and I saw her. She was prettier than I was. I almost cried. The next session I asked him if I was his favorite client. Has anyone else asked that question? He said that was a hard question but that I was way up there. That made me feel good. He said he really liked the kids he helps because they play basketball. I told him I could play basketball. He laughed. I didn't. It seems he laughs a lot and I don't. Karen
Posted by Dinah on October 31, 2003, at 16:59:50
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by karen_kay on October 31, 2003, at 16:53:31
I have never asked if I am his favorite client, and never will. I'd rather not hear the answer, I think. I do happen to know I'm his longest term client. As long as he treats me well, I don't much care. Except maybe I don't want him to think *very* negatively about me. I may not need to be liked, but I'd rather not be disliked by him.
Posted by Dinah on October 31, 2003, at 17:30:32
In reply to Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club » karen_kay, posted by Dinah on October 31, 2003, at 16:59:50
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