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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 12 of 12. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Penny on October 23, 2003, at 14:05:22
I checked out the skills manual and Linehan's book "Cognitive-Behavioral Treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder" from the university library today. They're not due back until January 21, so I have some time to look through them. I found the name of a psychologist here who runs a DBT skills group, but I haven't called to see about any of the details. I'm not sure I want to do this at all...
and is that a sign that I really don't want to get 'better'?
My head hurts.
P
Posted by deirdrehbrt on October 23, 2003, at 20:13:02
In reply to DBT skills manual, posted by Penny on October 23, 2003, at 14:05:22
Hi Penny,
I don't think that having a head that hurts, or even low motivation means that you don't want to get better. You did really good by going to the library and getting the books.
Maybe all that you need is to make a commitment to yourself, or someone outside, that you will at least call and see if the class is within your means. I think that you can do it, and I'm betting that you will, because you want to get better, if only for the reason that living the way you are is just plain intolerable.
I hope that you take the next step; it's really worth it, and it will make your life better.
Dee.
Posted by Dinah on October 23, 2003, at 20:16:28
In reply to DBT skills manual, posted by Penny on October 23, 2003, at 14:05:22
No, it doesn't mean that. It just means you have reservations.
So what do you think of the manual? My favorite part is the front part where she describes what goes on inside a borderline. I felt so *understood*.
Posted by fallsfall on October 24, 2003, at 6:55:42
In reply to Re: DBT skills manual, posted by Dinah on October 23, 2003, at 20:16:28
I liked the first part of the Skills Manual, too, for the same reason, Dinah. That was really the first time that I felt that someone else knew what it was like to be me. And the best part was that she also had a solution!
But my favorite part is the emotion lists in the back. I typed them into my computer and then printed them out and cut them apart so each word is on a different little piece of paper. I call it "Emotional Confetti". I even put the different emotion types on different color paper (pastels - red was love, blue was sadness, etc). Then you put them in a cup and shake and do the confetti thing. Sift through the words to find the ones that match you today. Most fun with a friend (but make sure you have two sets so you can each have a copy of the word you want).
I took two Dunkin Donuts cups. In one I put a little platform on top of a spring. The other had a stick that would push the platform down when the two cups were put end to end together. I filled it with emotional confetti and brought it to my session. I gave the cups to my therapist and asked her to take the top cup off. She did and the spring pushed the platform up and spewed the confetti all over her floor. That is how I was feeling - if I opened even a crack, all of these pent up emotions were going to explode uncontrollably all over the place. She got the message. And then... I was mortified that I had caused her office floor to be covered in little pieces of paper. I wanted to pick them up - I didn't want to dirty her world. But she made me sit in my chair and tolerate the mess. It was awful. I did clean up before I left. It was a great session.
The last time I was in the hospital, I took a wooden birdcage kit and made a small box with a hidden chamber protected by an airlock, like they have in submarines. I made the words "Anger" and "Rage" out of the alphabet bead that you use for necklaces. These went in the chamber. On top of the chamber went the emotional confetti. Then I put the top on the box. I made a "brain" that fit over the box out of "clay" (I had to try a couple of kinds before I found one that would work). I blew up a balloon and molded the brain over the balloon. I tried to put brain like markings on it, it was good that everyone had an imagination, and painted it grey. For the unveiling, I took a hammer to shatter the brain (break through my intellectualizations) and get to the emotions underneath. Of course, I made a really strong brain and I couldn't break it with the hammer (glad for the imaginations...). It was easy to take the top off the box and see the "easy" emotions. But then I cleared away the easy emotions to reveal a protected chamber, and from that chamber I could release the emotions that I hide away.
Art Therapy. Inspired by DBT.
Posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 7:53:18
In reply to Re: DBT skills manual - Art Therapy, posted by fallsfall on October 24, 2003, at 6:55:42
Wow! I wish we would have had good crafts to do in the hospital, but we didn't. Didn't even have good coloring books & crayons. It sucked. The rec therapist made me copies of some crossword puzzles and that's what I did - all day long. I couldn't concentrate long enough to read. But I would have loved it had there been some craft supplies there. Or even if I could have had some from home. OH well.
Posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 8:01:10
In reply to DBT skills manual, posted by Penny on October 23, 2003, at 14:05:22
Okay - I DID call the DBT therapist yesterday and left her a voice mail, and she called me back yesterday afternoon. We talked for a while and she seems really nice. They accept new patients each time they start studying a new module, so the soonest I could join would be 3-4 weeks from now, which is okay. It would be Monday evenings, which works well for me as it is currently my only free night of the week.
My biggest reserve right now is that I just don't think I can afford it. It would be covered by insurance but it would be $100 for the initial consult with the T and $60 a session, which I would have to pay upfront and then get reimbursed b/c they don't file for you (unlike my dear, darling therapist). I told my T last night that I knew I couldn't fork over that money and then wait to get reimbursed - I just don't have the money for that - and she said, "Did you ASK her if they could work out a payment option for you?" She's thinking that perhaps I could pay them what insurance doesn't cover each week and then pay them the rest as soon as I get reimbursed from insurance. She said I would, of course, need to set up a schedule for filing for insurance, and I guess that makes me nervous too, as I am terribly unorganized and that just seems like such an ominous task. But, I told her I would call the DBT T back and ask. Don't know if that will happen TODAY or not...
Haven't really had a chance to look through the books yet, so no comment on them. Except that I took them to therapy last night and she said that was a very 'me' (using my name) way of deciding if it was something I wanted to pursue - she seems amused sometimes at my relentless researching of things I am interested in. If ONLY I could be that interested in other things - like, maybe, WORK??? yeah, sure...
P
Posted by fallsfall on October 24, 2003, at 9:40:50
In reply to Re: DBT skills manual, posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 8:01:10
My therapist used to say "You are being so...Fallsfall" as well. Well, what are they expecting us to do???
The bill thing isn't impossible. It does take a little getting used to, but if I can do it, you can do it. Please don't be scared by this post - I'm a little hyper, and I want you to learn from all of my mistakes!
Currently I pay my therapist the co-payment and submit the bills to my insurance company. Initially, plan to submit each bill as you get it, later on they may let you submit once a month or every other week or something.
This is what I do: His bill goes in my pocketbook where I keep my money. I fill out a claim form, put it in an envelope with a stamp and address it (but don't seal it yet). I stop at the gas station or drug store (or use your scanner) to make a copy of the bill (I send them the copy and keep the original - He hand writes them and gives them to me - they have his fingerprints on them! I'm not sending the originals in. They don't care [either about me sending copies, nor about his fingerprints). I WRITE THE DATE THAT I AM MAILING THE ENVELOPE ON THE BACK OF THE BILL (this tells me that I really did do it, and also when, so if the check is late coming back, I know if it is because I submitted it late). Put the copy of the bill with the claim form, seal the envelope and get it into the mailbox. Then I put the bill in a special envelope with my regular bills. When the insurance money comes in, I take the bills out of that envelope and put them in a different "paid" envelope.
Challenges:
1. Really put the bill in your pocketbook in the right place.2. Don't run out of envelopes or stamps (if I were you, I'd set up 4 or 5 in advance so you don't have to worry about this possibility until later.
3. Remember to copy the bill (I make the envelope stick out of my pocketbook and be in the way so that I will remember that I have to stop)
4. As soon as you have the copy, put the whole thing in the first mailbox you can find (I have found that if I wait to put it in the Post Office mailbox, so it will be sure to go out TODAY that I'll forget to go there and the envelope gets lost in my car... I would have done better to put it in the mailbox at the end of my driveway and have the mail man pick it up the next day).
4. Have extra claim forms - always keep one blank claim form on hand so you can make copies of it if you need to. You can fill in the top and then make a copy of the partially filled in form so you don't have to fill it out every time - just put in the date and whatever. I tried this at first. But it is a little too complicated for me right now, so I just use a blank form. My company sends me a blank form with the check - if yours doesn't then get a stack. (I also have a PDF of the form so I can print one if I have to)
6. Don't leave the bill on the copy machine. Put it back in the same place until you can get it into the special envelope. The key is that bills with dates on the back have been submitted and bills without dates haven't.
JUST REMEMBER. Mailing that envelope is the most important thing to do. Stick it out of your pocketbook. Put it on your dashboard (or flat under your speedometer). Tie a string around your finger. Hang it from your rearview mirror. Put a sticker on your nose.
And be glad that the insurance company will help you pay for it!
Good Luck
Posted by Dinah on October 24, 2003, at 9:55:26
In reply to Re: DBT skills manual, posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 8:01:10
Why on earth would that be surprising? You're going to make a commitment of time and money, and have people messing about with your head. Why wouldn't you want to know what was involved?
(from one who relentlessly researches everything)
Posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 10:22:13
In reply to Re: DBT skills manual » Penny, posted by fallsfall on October 24, 2003, at 9:40:50
Okay, I'm printing this one out.
Before I moved, when I was seeing my pdoc in his old office, his office didn't file my insurance. I paid and had to file to get reimbursed. I ended up using my credit cards b/c I couldn't afford to see him otherwise and I was seeing him weekly. EVEN though he charged me the lowest fee he could (at that clinic - it wasn't just him, like it is now - now he has more control over his fees). Anyway, one day the receptionist asked me if I was getting my reimbursement, and I told her that I didn't know b/c I hadn't even filed yet. She asked me to bring in a copy of the blank claim form next time, so I did. She then made copies for me of all the receipts from my doc, printed out address labels to the insurance company, gave me envelopes, helped me fill out the forms, made copies for me for my records, put the papers in the envelope, and sealed and stamped it for me. Then she put in their mail. She gave me extra labels and envelopes and made me promise that I would file from then on out.
I don't know what is so hard to me about doing things like that...but it just is! I hate dealing with anything that has to do anything with finances...
Thanks, fallsfall!
P
Posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 10:26:30
In reply to Re: DBT skills manual » Penny, posted by Dinah on October 24, 2003, at 9:55:26
> Why on earth would that be surprising? You're going to make a commitment of time and money, and have people messing about with your head. Why wouldn't you want to know what was involved?
>
> (from one who relentlessly researches everything)I don't think she was surprised, in fact, I think she does the same thing. She seems a lot like me in a lot of ways. She just seems to find it amusing.
I KNOW my pdoc does. He researches everything. And has come to expect it of me.
My grandmother calls me when her doc prescribes something new to 'see what you can find out about it.'
But I had a boss tell me once that I think too much, and I just can't help it. I get very caught up in finding out what exactly is going on with whatever I'm involved with. Well, if it interests me, that is...
Like I said, if only I could apply this to WORK!
P
Posted by deirdrehbrt on October 24, 2003, at 10:32:52
In reply to Re: DBT skills manual » fallsfall, posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 10:22:13
Penny,
I am much like you. It is really difficult for me to get things done, even if it means that in the end I get money back.
Sometimes, I think it is because it is too complicated, sometimes because I just can't remember what I need to do without some sort of reminder, and sometimes because I am completely disorganized. I once did a job for General Electric. They had complicated paperwork, and consequently, I didn't get paid. I saw a number of therapists that wouldn't submit paperwork for me. I paid them, and never got reimbursed. I am glad that my current therapist does submit for me, otherwise I likely wouldn't be receiving services.
Unfortunately, this does spill over into other areas of my life. I often do things at the last minute. I forgot to submit a form regarding a previous mortgage, and I lost out on a $200.00 disbursement. I'm working on getting better at these things, but it is still incredibly difficult. Incredibly difficult though, doesn't mean impossible. I'm working on it, and it is getting a little better.
If I can start getting better at this, I'm sure that you can too.
Dee.
Posted by judy1 on October 24, 2003, at 11:28:22
In reply to DBT skills manual, posted by Penny on October 23, 2003, at 14:05:22
I agree it's incredibly overwhelming when you first see the manual (maybe that's why it's broken down into so many parts:-), but I think you're taking a very positive first step and I just know you'll gain a great deal from this. You got lots of good suggestions on how to be reimbursed (I really liked the post-it on the nose), in situations like yours I would work out a payment plan with the therapist and found guilt a great motivator for mailing bills in (my insurance usually reimbursed in 72 hours so I was able to pay the next session). I wish you all the best on your journey.
take care, judy
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