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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
[email protected]Shown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Saltmarsh Rose on June 28, 2003, at 14:20:36
Hi,
I'm kind of new to Babble and posting this one here because I'm confused about these personality disorders and medical Dx's. Maybe someone has some thoughts on whether there is some validity.
Anyway, the other day I took an online test and found that I had a high probability of Avoidant Personality Disorder. I have always been oddly fearful of certain types of people and situations where I would need to speak up. My discomfort got so bad that when I was much younger I would cross the street several times in the span of minutes to avoid certain people. This went on until my twenties, even later. As a child and adolescent I had trouble making friends who stuck around. I felt safe being friends with transient kids from families who moved away, kids who had parents who were alcoholics (I later learned) or somehow dysfunctional. As I got older I desperately wanted to be a cheerleader or act in school plays but was just panic-stricken at the thought of having to get up in front of an audience. I was never in the "IN Crowd", always on the fringes.
I don't initiate friendships, and have difficulty determining when someone is sincere about being friendly or just being social in a superficial way. I have a hard time with boundaries, I am a bit too trusting and that gets me into difficult situations, usually unhealthy relationships with men, but I'm getting better there. Now, my preference is to be alone usually, it's easier than getting disappointed by "friends" and feeling left out. I've taken to make stuff up about my social life so people won't think I'm this total shlump.In addition. I have a Dx of bi-polar II but then reading about Cyclothymic Personality Disorder made me think for a bit because the characteristics are much like BPII, and maybe I really don't need all these meds. I did have a lot of physical stuff going on though before taking these meds, and I have a family history of depression/suicide, but the Cyclothymic profile was quite accurate, especially the childhood part.
Anyway, I am feeling really miserable because I don't want to be the way I am, but I can't help the way I feel. I never initiate friendships because I am so afraid of rejection. I could never get that "gal pals" thing right, and who would want to be friends with me anyway, because of this horrid (BP) condition. My very last friend from a former job now is doing the email arms-length distancing thing, you know, I write an email to her and she basically cut/paste the same thing back.
I have a very good psychologist I've just started seeing...the time is so short, and I've been working on some workplace issues. Just wanted to know if anyone out there has any ideas about these Dx's or are they sort of on the back burner since the advent of cocktail therapy with AD's, Mood Stabilisers, SSRI's and the newer benzos for SAD and GAD?
Thanks very much :-)
Rose
Posted by fallsfall on June 28, 2003, at 15:37:19
In reply to Cyclothymia/BPll? Avoidant Personality/SAD ( long, posted by Saltmarsh Rose on June 28, 2003, at 14:20:36
Hi Rose,
First, don't put TOOO much stock in the online diagnostics. I have Borderline Personality Disorder, and the online test said that I had 3 other Personality Disorders, but not Borderline. The tests are fun, but I wouldn't bet too much money on them.
Personally, I think it is more accurate to find a copy of the DSM-IV diagnosis criteria and see if you think that you fit that.
I think that the diagnosis are for the therapist and pdoc's benefit. A particular illness may be known to respond to a particular therapy or drug. So if you know you have that illness it is easier and faster to know what will work.
Are you on meds? How long have you been on them?
You say that your time with your psychologist is short - am I right to assume that this means that you have a (insurance) limited number of sessions? If it is a small number then I think it is likely that your psychologist will be addressing the issues that you think are most pressing (i.e. the "crisis") rather than underlying structures. As such, the method that he uses for you won't be that different from other people - there isn't time for it to be much different.
I certainly think that it would be worth your while to say that you were looking online and wondered about the Avoidant Personality Disorder. Then maybe he would think about it, and tell you what he thought.
The way I read it (and I am NOT a professional), Cyclothymia has the ups and downs like BPII, but the highs are not as high, and the lows are not as low, and (maybe?) there is less middle time. My guess is that if they diagnosed you with BPII, they thought your mania and depression were significant enough. But it does say you can have both, so maybe I'm not understanding it right.
Posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 17:29:32
In reply to Cyclothymia/BPll? Avoidant Personality/SAD ( long, posted by Saltmarsh Rose on June 28, 2003, at 14:20:36
I agree with FF - don't place too much emphasis on the online personality tests. I haven't been diagnosed with any personality disorders, but tested online strongly for Avoidant Personality Disorder.
My Dx? "Mood Disorders Not Otherwise Specified" IMO this means they don't know what the heck is wrong with me!!! My last therapist actually had me down as Major Depressive Disorder Recurrent and Dysthymic Disorder, but it ignored the mood swings I was experiencing. I don't qualify for BP, as I don't experience true mania, but I don't clearly fall under the DSM-IV description of plain ol' depressive disorder either.
As for the meds - I think med cocktails are the new trend. At least in my case, my doc doesn't pay too much attention to the diagnosis and treats my symptoms as he sees them. I mean, he did start with the AD, but then added another AD, an AP, an MS and a thyroid med. So... They're all meant to augment one another.
Another note: If insurance with your therapy sessions is a problem, I would talk now to your therapist about working out some kind of arrangement for when your insurance runs out. My last therapist agreed to accept a lesser amount than her normal fee when I had run out of sessions. My current insurance allows for my therapist/pdoc to request additional sessions if needed (and they will definitely be needed!!!). So, those are a couple of thoughts about that, for what it's worth.
Best of luck to you.
Penny
Posted by Saltmarsh Rose on June 29, 2003, at 10:39:35
In reply to Cyclothymia/BPll? Avoidant Personality/SAD ( long, posted by Saltmarsh Rose on June 28, 2003, at 14:20:36
Fallsfall & Penny: Thank you both for your thoughts, suggestions...
I've been on lithium for a long time, 16 years. It has basically stopped the physical wierdness that went with my (only hypomanic) highs, like racing thoughts and grinding stomach, and the edgy irritability. I still go through spendathons though..can't hold on to a buck.
My other meds have *somewhat* helped the depression & anxiety: lamictal and gabapebtin. I was hospitalized recently and have been on trazodone which every so often makes me go off the scale...is it a mixed state? Two-stepping in the Shaw's market, happy, giddy, sillines. It doesn't last long though. I like it because its the way I used to get back in the day (pre-Li) before doing really dumb things, like drive around town with vodka tonics to settle my nerves.
I'm going to ask my psychologist about the test results. I can see him only a few more visits and then I need to get reauthorized - close to the yearly visit limit on insurance.
I used two different sites, one for NYU psychiatric; they both pointed to Avoidant.I also am going to make myself go to a support group similar to the one described in DBSA: http://www.dbsalliance.org/
Now that I think about this, support groups can be helpful with the Social Anxiety stuff;there are also speakers sometimes.Thank you again,
Rose
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