Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 12459

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Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you

Posted by jbc on November 11, 2003, at 8:21:32

In reply to Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you, posted by karen t bag on November 11, 2003, at 6:20:44

Thanks Karen! I know about the dizziness. At some points I feel like I did the time my aunt accidentally gave me 4x as much cough medicine as she should have when I was about 6 yrs old. I went from side to side down the hall - first bumping into one wall, then the other. Too funny!

I finally gave in & took a day off from work today & shared with my boss what was going on. I hadn't even told him about what I was experiencing. I guess there was a shame issue going on. Has anyone else experienced that when trying to explain everything to folks in your life? Just curious!

 

Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you

Posted by karen t bag on November 11, 2003, at 9:00:05

In reply to Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you, posted by jbc on November 11, 2003, at 8:21:32

hi,
so glad to hear its not just me and the dizziness - in reply to your question about telling other people - my husband is the only person who knows whats going on - i feel too 'ashamed' i guess to tell friends and family - i dont work - im enjoying being a homemaker so i know friends and family would do the 'whats she got to feel depressed about in the first place' - it makes me start to cry even thinking about it - i guess i need to make some new friends i can be completley honest with - how have you found people react when you tell them?

thanks
karen

 

Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you

Posted by jbc on November 11, 2003, at 9:16:45

In reply to Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you, posted by karen t bag on November 11, 2003, at 9:00:05

So far so good!?! I am blessed that even though I have to work, I get to work on the staff at my church. I support our Education Min, Children's Min & our Family Life Center Dir. They are all precious people who love me dearly & support me! They also keep things confidential which, sadly enough, can be tricky in a church!

I'm not sure where you live, so maybe we can't be traditional friends, but I'd gladly be your cyber friend!

 

Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you

Posted by karen t bag on November 11, 2003, at 12:13:02

In reply to Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you, posted by jbc on November 11, 2003, at 9:16:45

HI JBC,
thanks for the post - i live in the uk in the midlands - im not sure where you are from
karen

 

Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you » karen t bag

Posted by jbc on November 11, 2003, at 12:43:59

In reply to Re: Effexor Withdrawl - I did it, so can you, posted by karen t bag on November 11, 2003, at 12:13:02

I live in Tulsa, Oklahoma, USA. Almost right in the middle of the country. My heritage is Scottish, however. My maiden name was Forbes. About 17 yrs ago we found out there was a Forbes tartan. A friend of mine sent me a scarf made from it while she was in graduate school in St. Andrews. It is beautiful.

That may be more than you ever wanted to know. Anyway, Karen, please feel free to contact me directly at [email protected] (This offer is currently for Karen only - all other e-mails will be ignored!). I look forward to hearing from you.!

Jana

 

Ohmygawd I feel so stupid

Posted by Jasper on November 12, 2003, at 15:12:50

In reply to Cold turkey, posted by Dr...Not! on November 10, 2003, at 17:31:44

Well, wasn't I surprised to discover today (only two hours ago) that my Effexor addiction is REAL and much more serious than I ever imagined. I've been on Efffexor XR 75mg for about five years now. My mental health has come together nicely over that period. No more depression... no more illegal drug use... no more alcohol... great marriage... beautiful baby girl... etc. etc. everything's going great. Well almost. I started to have a sneaking suspicion that my ever present anxiety disorder and rising blood pressure were being caused by the Effexor. I couldn't figure out why else I would have high blood pressure and anxiety. I'm 40, I don't drink, I don't smoke, I exercise, etc. (interesting my GP never put 2 & 2 together) So I decided to stop taking the Effexor. I knew there would be some uncomfortable side effects associated with stopping since I had forgotten to bring my meds along on a weekend trip a year ago and fealt the ringing/shimmering in the ears. Two weeks ago I started taking half a capsule (opening and spilling half the little white balls down the drain and re-capping) every other day for a week and I figured it was now time to stop all together. Well today it is day four and after nearly fainting in my kitchen a few hours ago and feeling like my heart was going to explode I decided to do a google search on "effexor withdrawl." WHOOAA! I feel so freaking stupid but I had no idea! Now what do I do??? I have a few specific questions: I'm not even sure if the dose I'm on is strong or not? I'm definitely not ready/able/courageous enough to go cold turkey. What dosage schedule can I try to ween off? If I go back to my doc what dose should I ask for... what dosages do they make and what would be the last stepping off dose?How long should I taper off for? I will ask my doctor these questions but I have absolutley no trust in him now since he never even told me that Effexor was addictive in the beginning! Thank you so very very much, in advance, for any help anyone can offer.

 

Re: Ohmygawd I feel so stupid

Posted by Stavros on November 12, 2003, at 16:59:39

In reply to Ohmygawd I feel so stupid, posted by Jasper on November 12, 2003, at 15:12:50

Jasper, I have had to go off Effexor twice and it's tough but you will make it.
- titrate down as slowly as you can weekly then i think when you get down to 37.5 or what ever the lowest does offered is then like your said spill out some of the capsule if even going every other day.
- I would also recommend a P doc as they kno best and finally many docs will recomment one dose of prozac as it helps with the withdrawl. good luck and i think there are lots of post about this. S

 

Effexor almost killed me - now withdrawal

Posted by responsiblek9 on November 13, 2003, at 4:43:36

In reply to Effexor withdrawal symptoms!, posted by Becky on October 2, 1999, at 22:03:30

The effexor caused me internal intestinal hemmorage . Second SSRI to do so too. So now I have not just the gut pain but horrendous withdrawal symptoms. I never had this severe a withdrawal symptom form any SSRI before and I have been on Zoloft, paxil, and a few more I cant remember the names of . I have run out of meds I can try because of severe physical reactions most life threatening . But this one took the cake.

I already have physical problems with joint issues and this has made them unbearable. What can I do for these side effects. I am collapsing without warning ,with extreme weakness and heart arythmias and cant function. The sleep cycle reversed on me so I cant stay awake during the day and I am fighting that because with the sleep disorder I could not sleep but 4 hours a night for over two years. So I really need the 8 hours of sleep I am getting now. I was told ther SSRIs were not addictive. But this has not proven to be the case for this with me. I am pretty unhappy about it too. I have been given research stating otherwise from all over . And even found a letter stating from a researcher that patients should not be told these meds can be possibly addicting. I was actively trying to avoid addictive meds over the past 14 years because I know I have a problem with getting easily addicted to stuff from childhood issues. I am afraid to try anything else after two strikes in a row of this hemmoraging from SSRI"s and I cant take the MAOIs or the Tricyclics because of severe reactions to them previously.I have tried the atypicals like Seroquel and several like that and had several near fatal reactions here 5 years ago.
Currently I was on a low dosage of Effexor 37.5 for three months . Then went to 75mg per day split into two doses for 3 months. And I still got the near lethal reaction. I am so frustrated. Nothing that works has not ended up with these extreme problems with physical reactions that are so dangerous.
I am seeing my med doc tommorrow and bringing her the research papers that state the withdrawal symptoms and see if she knows how to help me get through this. The psych docs just scratch their heads and have told me " we dont know what to do"
The Effexor did have a funny effect when I was taking it though. It was like taking speed.
A real rush for a couple hours after I had taken it and would wear off in about 4 hours. Then I was at normal mode. Weird. I complained about the agitation problem it was causing and they gave me Alprazolam to try and remedy that. Wasn't working too well though . They may have to use the dosage the alprazolam works at as a SSRI reuptake and see if that will help. It is the only med I Dont have side effects with or physical reactions to. Odd . But I am scared of it because I know it is addictive . Catch 22 . Anyone else run into this dillemma . My poor therapist is spooked on this . And I am just miserable physically with the pain and weakness. I understand I had a rare reaction though. The meds works so well for many I know .
Frustrated in Colorado

 

You're not stupid!

Posted by Dr...Not! on November 13, 2003, at 17:53:46

In reply to Effexor almost killed me - now withdrawal, posted by responsiblek9 on November 13, 2003, at 4:43:36

I am taking Effexor XR, which comes in capsules of 37.5, 75, 112.5, 150 and 300 mg. I was taking 300 mg per day for about 8 years. I am now taking 75 mg per day, having accomplished withdrawl from the 300 mg over the past 5 months (part of which time I was holding steady on the Effexor and withdrawing from Klonopin and Serzone).

First of all, know that you will probably not get through this as quickly as you would like.

Second, start writing down what dosage you take at what time, so you don't forget when you decreased and by how much (trust me, you will forget).

Third, TAKE THE SAME DOSE EVERY DAY. Effexor is notorious for being picky, picky, picky within a 24-hour period. Halving the dose every other day will not help you reach your goal, it will just confuse your body and make the withdrawal worse!

The key for withdrawal, at least in my case, has been 1) to work with a psychiatrist who is supportive regarding withdrawal symptoms (none of that "it's all in your head" stuff), and 2) to give my body time to get used to a reduced dose before reducing the dose again. For example, I reduced the dose from 300 mg (2x150 capsule) to 262.5 mg (1x150, 1x75, 1x37.5 mg), had physical symptoms of nausea, palpitations, nightmares, sweating, light-headedness, whatever, and then continued on that dosage until the symptoms went away. Then, I stayed at that dosage for another week, with everything feeling OK. ONLY THEN was it time to reduce the 262.5 mg to 225 mg (1x150, 1x75 mg), and repeat the whole process.

Of course, we grow too soon old and too late smart. I'm referring to my stupidity in trying to "push" the process along instead of following what has been working all these months. So, instead of waiting for the last symptoms to work themselves out of my system at 75 mg, I dropped to 37.5, still had problems, and then stopped the 37.5 - and BAM ! Chills, shakes, nightmares extraordinaire, dizziness, nausea, crying - duh! Here I am, back at 75 mg, feeling OK (except for those palpitations) and planning to stay at 75 mg until at least after the New Year.

When I again start reducing the dosage, I will NOT be "splitting" the capsules, because Effexor is so PICKY, PICKY, PICKY. (I don't think counting the little white balls will work because the little white balls are not all the same size, and you can just forget about "eyeballing" how much is in each capsule half!! Not accurate enough!!) If I've let my body recover, that last 37.5 mg reduction should be do-able (I'll let you know).

The main point I'm trying to make is, whatever you do, DO NOT RUSH THE PROCESS. There is a tendency for people (myself included) to resent what we may see as the "wussy" way. We're tough, we tell ourselves. We'll bite the bullet and get this stuff out of our system. We don't like being dependent on a drug, because that means we're weak.

WRONG! If you have a headache, you take aspirin. If you don't, you're not "strong," you're stupid. You drive a car 20 miles to work, don't you? Why aren't you walking the 20 miles? Because the car is there, it is a tool, and you use it. You use a hammer to drive nails, you wear shoes to protect your feet from rocks . . . some of us need insulin to regulate our blood sugar and some of us need pills to keep our synapses synapping. If you are part of this group, you have no need to apologize to others - tell them to get a hobby and leave you alone.

In the meantime, you DON'T wear the shoes on your hands . . . which means, use tools appropriately, according to their instructions. With Effexor, this means taking your med at the same time every day, and decreasing your dose slowly and under the supervision of a doctor.

Gotta go - late for choir practice!


 

Re: You're not stupid! » Dr...Not!

Posted by Jasper on November 13, 2003, at 19:40:26

In reply to You're not stupid!, posted by Dr...Not! on November 13, 2003, at 17:53:46

> Thank you so much Dr... Not!. I don't know why but it just feels good to hear from someone else that is going through the same thing. I really did feel stupid for being on a prescription drug for five years without knowing a damn thing about the withdrawal's that were waiting out there for me. Anyway I feel better now that I've been learning more about Effexor and feel more emotionally prepared to deal! Once I realized the other day that I was in for way more than I bargained for I decided to go back to taking the original 75mg, which I did yesterday morn and this morn. Weird thing i feel even more screwed up then before... the heart palpitations are scary. I got in the shower a few hours ago and felt like my head was going to zap (that actually hasn't happened to me yet but I've read about it here and in the shower I felt like I could easily see/feel that happening. ) So anyway I have an appointment with my GP tomorrow at 2 and I'm going to ask for a script for two months worth of 35mg xr. I'm going to take your advice and take it slow. I've been on this stuff for five years now anyway, what's another 2 months. Once I start taking the 35's tomorrow, I hope to be able to normalize from the reduction by Thanksgiving when I will have family visiting from out of town. After the new year I'll go cold turkey from the 35mg dosage and may try add in some Prozac as I've heard suggested here. Anyway, thanks again for taking the time to share your experience. Good luck with your final steps as well! I hope to hear more about your experiences here later!

 

Re: Effexor almost killed me - now withdrawal » responsiblek9

Posted by jbc on November 13, 2003, at 22:17:40

In reply to Effexor almost killed me - now withdrawal, posted by responsiblek9 on November 13, 2003, at 4:43:36

Bless your heart! I can't even imagine dealing with what you are going through. I am having side effects, but nothing like what you are dealing with. I'm going through a spell of the body "quivers/shivers" right now. It feels like my insides are vibrating. Weird stuff.

Unfortunately, I don't have any advice for you. I can tell you that I will be praying for you. I will pray that you get good results from whatever you decide to try, and that your doctors will have wisdom in choosing the right thing. Hang in there!

Praying for you from your "neighbor" in Oklahoma

 

Re: efxr withdrawal » Jasper

Posted by pixygoth on November 14, 2003, at 8:29:53

In reply to Re: You're not stupid! » Dr...Not!, posted by Jasper on November 13, 2003, at 19:40:26

Remember about splitting capsules being unreliable. I went from 37.5 a day to *half that* a day for a week (it was the normal release at that dose)- and now to nothing, and I have a *very* dizzy, buzzy thing going on, nevertheless.
I just wanted to get across that maybe 35 a day isn't even low enough for the lowest dose before stopping - just a thought. Bear it in mind, and don't plan on any big events when you stop, just like you say!
S

 

Re: efxr withdrawal

Posted by Jasper on November 14, 2003, at 11:48:37

In reply to Re: efxr withdrawal » Jasper, posted by pixygoth on November 14, 2003, at 8:29:53

Thanks very much for the thoughts. I REALLY appreciate them! I'll consider that before I try to stop all together.

 

Re: My experience with quitting cold turkey (150 mg)

Posted by jiggitykid on November 14, 2003, at 15:32:53

In reply to Re: My experience with quitting cold turkey (150 mg) » Sanjay Singhal, posted by foodie on November 1, 2003, at 22:56:25

I have just quit taking at 225. I am dizzy, hot/cold, nauseated, diarrhea, feverish (but no fever), PAIN all over and feelings like I've been hooked up to a shock machine which is giving me shockwaves that start in my head and move down. Weird, very vivid, episodic dreams. Sometimes I can't remember having done something. WHEN can I expect this to taper off? Thanks for help.

 

Re: My experience with quitting cold turkey (150 mg) » jiggitykid

Posted by jbc on November 14, 2003, at 18:14:26

In reply to Re: My experience with quitting cold turkey (150 mg), posted by jiggitykid on November 14, 2003, at 15:32:53

Don't do it! Don't quit cold turkey. You're only harming yourself. Look at some of the other posts. Take time & wean yourself off of it slowly. Look at some of the posts from "Dr__Not" (I think that's the name). He did it over months at a time & had some success. I have only been on a maximum dosage of 75 mg - for less than 1 yr - went down to 37.5 for 1 week then to nothing & experienced the same things you have. You have got to be having them exponentially worse than I am! Please reconsider going off cold turkey. I think you'll be better off in the long run!

Praying for you in Oklahoma!

 

Re: Ohmygawd I feel so stupid

Posted by awatts on November 15, 2003, at 16:10:13

In reply to Ohmygawd I feel so stupid, posted by Jasper on November 12, 2003, at 15:12:50

> Well, wasn't I surprised to discover today (only two hours ago) that my Effexor addiction is REAL and much more serious than I ever imagined. I've been on Efffexor XR 75mg for about five years now. My mental health has come together nicely over that period. No more depression... no more illegal drug use... no more alcohol... great marriage... beautiful baby girl... etc. etc. everything's going great. Well almost. I started to have a sneaking suspicion that my ever present anxiety disorder and rising blood pressure were being caused by the Effexor.

I'm no doctor, so I'll just offer my thoughts on your situation. Why are you quiting Effexor? Sounds like it changed your life for the better. Consider controling the anxiety and blood pressure by other means. That's what I did. A low dose of Inderal dropped my BP right back down, and 0.5mg of Klonopin twice a day controls the additional anxiety caused by 150mg of Effexor XR.
Effexor gave me my life back. Don't blow it just because you fear "addiction". Think about what you may be giving up by quiting a drug that really works for you.

 

I can see your point, but... » awatts

Posted by Jasper on November 16, 2003, at 7:52:37

In reply to Re: Ohmygawd I feel so stupid, posted by awatts on November 15, 2003, at 16:10:13

Your point is well taken, but the thing you have to add into my equation is that I'm a recovering opiate addict and alcoholic. So Klonopin or alprolezam, etc. are not viable options for me. Regarding the depression, I want to see how I do now without medication. So much in my life has changed for the better that I feel I'm ready to go it on my own. I also want to confirm my suspicion that the high blood pressure is in fact being caused by the Effexor. If I find that I'm still suffering from intolerable levels of depression I will definitely consider going back on an AD, put probably not Effexor... possibly Lexapro. And if the BP remains an issue I will definitley need to go on inderal. Thanks for your thoughts!

 

Re: You're not stupid!

Posted by responsiblek9 on November 17, 2003, at 5:03:42

In reply to You're not stupid!, posted by Dr...Not! on November 13, 2003, at 17:53:46

Sorry but I had to pull off of it immediately and completely or I would not have survived . the blood los was very bad and I did not have the luxery to taper off the stuff. My med doc at least is working with me . Therapist is also. But I have been told by the med doc with my history of reactions I can NEVER take any SSRI or atypical antidepressive ever again. It has been several weeks and I have the withdrawal still very bad. Myu neighbors have stepped in though because I cant function. I explained what was going on and they have bailed in because now I cant walk. too weak. This really stinks. I wonder what else will go wrong next. But at least I have some people who decided they want to help and want me around even though I am very ill. At least they value me. The psych doc just seems to feel my health means nothing and it does not matter of the meds kill me off. I guess when next time I go see the psych doc I will take my Conservator . There has to be another way besides these meds to get help with the depression without these lethal reactions . better my conservator speak on my behalf than me . They wont argue with him at least. I guess it is time to do a Psychiatric Advanced directive to have better protection from some inadvertent prescribing of one of these meds which seem so lethal to me. I am just one of the unlucky ones who just cant take them. Real Bummer !
Scared in Colorado
------------------------------------------

 

Re: My experience with quitting cold turkey (150 mg) » foodie

Posted by responsiblek9 on November 17, 2003, at 5:11:36

In reply to Re: My experience with quitting cold turkey (150 mg) » Sanjay Singhal, posted by foodie on November 1, 2003, at 22:56:25

Cold turkey on the Effexor is very painful sometimes. I had to stop i dead cold from just the 75mg. And it has been causing me joint agony and severe depression plus the electric shocks the first two weeks was very bad. If you dont have to stop the Effexor cold turkey, Dont! I was not given that option. But if you are wanting off and not having the horrible issue I had. Then try tapering off. Dont go through the pain I am in right now. Especially of you dont have to. Sincerely , Responsible K9 in Colorado
----------------------------------------------

> I have been taking 225 mg of effexor xr for over a year. I want to get off the medicine in hopes it will allow me to stop taking my blood pressure medicine (have NEVER had high BP). My doctor said to just drop back to two a day for awhile and see how I did. It never occurred to me that I may be having symptoms until I read this site. Itchy skin, severe insomnia, irritable (not common for me) weepy, and venom that can come out of nowhere (but only for my husband,) enhanced sensitivity. I only struggle with clinical depression but have reached a point that I just want to do this without meds if possible and take my life back. So, dear readers - quite gradually or cold turkey.

 

Re: You're not stupid!

Posted by Jiggitykid on November 17, 2003, at 7:45:54

In reply to Re: You're not stupid!, posted by responsiblek9 on November 17, 2003, at 5:03:42

Bless you - you are in my prayers, and I am sure that you are in the prayers of other readers here. I'm sure you know that you need a new psych care provider, and it sounds as if you need a new med doc as well. Have you considered/is it an option for you to contact someplace where you can be admitted - not a psych hospital per se, but somewhere where you can be watched 24/7 and totally detoxed and started over? You clearly are not getting the care that you need. Again, you are in my prayers and I encourage you, as much as you are capable right now, search for better medical care.

 

Re: You're not stupid! Dr. ....Not

Posted by sasha71 on November 17, 2003, at 8:47:20

In reply to You're not stupid!, posted by Dr...Not! on November 13, 2003, at 17:53:46

That was an excellent post!!

I too have noticed that Effexor is extremely PICKY about timing your doses.

I've wondered why there isn't a "grace period" for similar meds. when it can take weeks for them to reach full effectiveness. One would think there would be a grace period to accidentally miss a dose without being slammed with The Dreams From Hell and other problems.

I too hate being chained to my meds - but I find the alternative to be completely unacceptable, as does my family.

I'll probably print out your post and keep it to read again and again. Thanks.

 

Re: Effexor withdrawal symptoms sleeping a lot

Posted by sideburnsdan on November 17, 2003, at 9:16:34

In reply to Re: Effexor withdrawal symptoms & sleeping a lot, posted by anita on October 3, 1999, at 14:38:53

i kicked cold turkey from 200 mg's and i could probably fall asleep in a construction sight. i'm a bad insomniac and effexor withdrawal seems to make sleep more than possible, it makes oversleeping inevitable. and now i'm getting that wonderful side effect where when i sleep i have horriffic nightmares. lovely!


> Hi,
>
> I've been reducing my Effexor dose and lately I've been sleeping even more than usual.
> I can sleep for 18 hours, be up for 6 hours, and then sleep another 8 hours. Can this be
> a withdrawal symptom? I assumed it was just because I am depressed and thus not exactly thrilled
> to be awake, but even so, this oversleeping is kinda ridiculous!
>
> anita

 

Re: Effexor withdrawal symptoms sleeping a lot

Posted by sasha71 on November 17, 2003, at 9:23:44

In reply to Re: Effexor withdrawal symptoms sleeping a lot, posted by sideburnsdan on November 17, 2003, at 9:16:34

I find that I don't always have bad dreams/nightmares....but the dreams I do have are always extremely detailed - even to the point of I can wake up and my fingers will tingle and remember textures in the dream. I can almost taste colors.

Those dreams wear me out - I wake up mentally exhausted. I've thought about writing down the dreams but I realized that I remember them well enough and have no desire to keep them in a permanent form.

 

effexor withdrawal

Posted by sideburnsdan on November 17, 2003, at 9:29:06

In reply to Effexor withdrawal symptoms!, posted by Becky on October 2, 1999, at 22:03:30

i wasn't on effexor for a long time, maybe half a year, but i was at 200 mg's (and i'm hyper-sensitive to medication) and i came to realize that if i missed a DAY i'd feel suicidal. which is usually a good reason to stop taking a medicine haha.

anyway, tapering off was too hard for me. it just dragged out horrible withdrawals, so i stopped cold turkey. wow. i have that electric-zap-type thing whenever i move my eyes and it feels almost like i have temporary arthritis. it seems like effexor withdrawal includes any possible horrible sensation. because the only thing i've yet to have (knock on wood) is a seizure, which i'm quite honestly waiting for.

i could sleep and eat all day (which i couldn't do on or before effexor), but when i sleep i have horrible nightmares that make me want to stay awake and when i eat, it's a matter of minutes before i run to the bathroom because i'm so sick.

i don't have enough space to say all the horrible things about this drug that i have to say.

anyway,i had read something about long-term vision problems. anyone heard of that?

also.... does anyone see things out of the corner of their eyes? like a slight flash or movement? i don't know how to describe it, much like with every other side effect. i just don't want to feel like this forever, but these symptoms feel like they're getting worse and worse every day. ugh

 

Re: is THIS normal?

Posted by Laurie789 on November 17, 2003, at 11:08:16

In reply to is THIS normal?, posted by ellie B on October 6, 2003, at 21:51:37

I've been coming off Effexor for about 3 months. I'm down to 25mg every other day. This is day 3 of not taking any. I woke up this morning with blurred vision (It was like a blurry wave going across my line of sight). That lasted about 45 minutes, then vision returned to normal and I'm left with a moderate headache. That is what prompted me to go browsing the internet and I found this website. I've been plagued by a bad acne over the past two months. I've had the dizziness and vivid dreams. Exagerrated PMS and crying. The worst part of this is that I've been hollering at my 5 yr. old son and he doesn't deserve it and I feel awful.


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