Posted by rjlockhart37 on March 31, 2014, at 21:28:45
i've been listening to music, i have to say music does stimulate the mind depending on the perference....upbeat, slow, soft, depressing, and rock.....
but i know that i maybe talk aobut myself too much here and it's annoying, thats what chased people away in the past and my family, parading myself on people....and so far, i've stopped that behavior, i shut people out of my life that i know didnt work....but also its damaging at the same time because it ruined old relationships.....my brother, friends, but see all i know is they got tired of me, so i terminated all contact and associations.....to be safe, for myself.....
im not gonna explain pointless intellect of how i feel about things.....i'm really been thinking of shutting this chaper of life....it basically is called the dark ages...nothing happened, and it was all dark and depressing, no hope.....so plan...get my image going again and stop floating around like cute little matt that everyone thinks is adorable....my contacts during 2009-current all treated me like a pet....went up to me and said how cute you are.....did that annoying phrase "awwww" he's so cute....ughhhhh i hate that phrase! matt's petting zoo....ugh, yuck, eeek, get this outta here!
but back in when i posted in 2005, my goals where set, and what happened i think i've explained this is that i was ripped off dexedrine, and stayed in a nonactive state, the doctor's were/is idiots, there idiots....to believe that i should stay in a idlestate and do nothing.....that's bad....so whatever dopamine surges i can make to make me determined to get out of this state.....practice, visulization.....adrenaline therapy.....
but from now......this has gotta go, i'm tired of living in the petting zoo and people want to come sqinch my cheeks and tell how cute i am....yuk, im not a panda bear.....and run all over me......the wittyness i had needs to come back....lost my idenity for a long time.....and it's time to start new.....yet i have no idea even writing this that i will succeed in this new state.....
but cheers.....to the new matt....by bye teddybear cute tallk.....i was not destined to end up like this.....so.....dopamine systems activate LOL
r
not a scholar but understand distress.....
"unheard pain, is the told through good company"
poster:rjlockhart37
thread:1063510
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20140312/msgs/1063510.html