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Re: Sorry, many questions, many good answers » Muffled

Posted by llurpsienoodle on November 29, 2007, at 20:40:37

In reply to Sorry, many questions, many good answers, posted by Muffled on November 29, 2007, at 20:28:00

> Thank you.
> This questions could be TRIGGER if you not like to think about when you kid, so not to read this if so, cuz it might make you sad to think of being a kid if so.
>
> My next question is, I dunno how to explain, but how does it feel for a person who is NOT split, like how, ohhhhh, so when you think of yourself, and remember something from being a kid, does it seem like *you* were that kid? Do you feel like that kid is you?

I've always used different aspects of my character in different situations. I was the kid who used to make her nose bloody to get out of first grade, and the kid who played a solo on the violin with an orchestra when I was 7. I was very functional when it came to dealing with teachers. I was very dysfunctional when it came to dealing with kids my own age. I went through some periods I don't remember well at all. I remember always being chunky but not all my pictures bear that out.

>Does in the memory, the kid, and her body, is it like your own body as a kid? Is it all connected somehow? Or not?
> So like when you remember, I used to climb trees, does it all feel like yourownself? Can YOU remember climbing trees?

I can see the same hands I've always had and can feel the magnolia bark; it's smooth with hard scabs on it. my fingers are the same fingers, because I look at them a lot. They haven't changed that much. the ones on the left hand are more flexible and longer. the right hand ones are thicker and stronger.

There is a change of dimension though. I used to play a little bitty violin, and it fit me just right, now I play a regular violin and it still feels the right size, but when I go back to the little one my hands are ginormous.

> I'm not sure I am describing this well.
> Mebbe someone will figger it, or not.
> Thanks,
> Muffled
>

you'll have to ask some expert, I guess. My childhood is likely to have some degree of fragmentation. t tells me that I behave like someone who was loved as a child. hmmph.

ll


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