Posted by Squiggles on August 10, 2007, at 15:42:24
In reply to Re: getting back into therapy. » Squiggles, posted by B2chica on August 10, 2007, at 14:59:53
> >>>If it can be done, great, but what about situations where you can change your response through therapy but an abuser can't, won't or will kill you if you try to stand up to him?
>
> i think this is usually what happens...you can't change other people...you can ONLY change how you act/react to others.my first T taught me that...i am NOT responsible for others actions/reactions...only my own.
> if you feel that your changing will put your life in danger than you need to act accordingly, either stay in the relationship doing what you need to survive, or until you are killed, or do what you need to escape. Please don't misunderstand me...none of those options are easy...NONE, and i in NO WAY mean to make light.
> dealing with a person who is a sociopath or anti-authority type personalities (basically any abuser) is impossible to do...even professionals trained to deal with psyche's of criminals don't do so with success (as we think of it)..heck just look at the recitivism rate from prisons..isn't it something like 70% re-offend??
>
> remember, therapy is not about others...it's about you.
>
> >>That is the kind of psychoanalysis that people need; what Ts do is never that heavy.
>
> T's job's are a passive kind of job...they don't 'cure' or 'fix' people..that's not their job. they are guides or sometimes teachers that help you to make your life more rewarding. they work with Quality of life...Not Quantity.
> you may be looking for someone with a more 'active' job skill such as a doctor, or even a social worker or police officer...they deal with 'the others'.
>
> i hope you can find what you need Squiggles.
> b2c.Thanks for that post; that's probably the most helpful post i have had regarding difficult situations, and the role of therapists. Frankly,
I think a can of MACE would be cheaper and maybe land you in a safe place, like jail away from your abuser. (black humour)Thank you again. I'll have to figure something out, lol. Maybe marry one of those survivor types who are armed to the teeth and drive a really huge pick-up truck, and say "mess with my woman and prepare to mess with me" :-)
Squiggles
poster:Squiggles
thread:775224
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070807/msgs/775322.html