Posted by Daisym on September 1, 2006, at 1:09:48
In reply to Whoa -- where did that come from? (Part 1 - long), posted by Racer on August 31, 2006, at 14:10:34
******So this week, my PT will be away on Friday. The other time this happened, I cancelled my appointment. I was talking to my T about whether it was OK for me to cancel again, and that started us talking about it. And she seemed to be leaning towards "if it's helping you, don't cancel." And that set me off, floods and floods. I can't even tell what scares me about it. But I know I feel nauseous just thinking about it, and when I try to imagine it actually happening -- well, let's not go there, huh?
****((((Racer))))
I'm sorry for the floods. I could be way out in left field -- OK, I know I usually am -- but my first hit on this was that your therapist didn't step up and protect you. She didn't tell little racer that she didn't have to let anyone touch her, especially someone new, someone you don' trust. And to leave you to have to tell yet another person "don't touch too much" - well, that sets me off. She should have, imo, helped you feel comfortable choosing to not do something that you thought you should do, but something that was too hard right now.I could have written your Part II post -- asking to get my needs met is the quickest way to a terror-fest for me. I think the reasons are all that you listed, including and especially, "I'm not supposed to have needs."
I'm glad you feel reconnected though. That is important. I give you permission to cancel tomorrow and if not that, then to cut it short if you need to. I also give you permission to stay and be Ok with the touching. Not all touching is bad, you know? I mean, cats seem to like it...
poster:Daisym
thread:681737
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060826/msgs/681956.html