Posted by cubic_me on October 23, 2005, at 10:11:40
When ever I have felt really suicidal in the past, I have tried to make myself look at photos of dead people as I know this really repulses me and seems to be fairly effective in stopping me killing myslef. But now it's backfiring on me because I've got this fear of my body being dead, of how horrible it will look, how much of a burden it will be and the total loss of control. It is completely irrational seeing as I believe that when I am dead I will truely be gone and won't know anything about it.
Knowing I had suicide as a way out used to help me get through, and now I'm so repulsed by it that I don't have that theoretical (and actual?) way out.
Perhaps I should seriously think about going back to therapy, rather than dithering.
poster:cubic_me
thread:570861
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051018/msgs/570861.html