Posted by gardenergirl on July 8, 2004, at 15:59:29
In reply to Re: disturbing dream means???***possible trigger**, posted by B2chica on July 8, 2004, at 15:47:41
B2C,
If you think of animals' behavior when they are threatened, some fight back, some flee, and some freeze. Think of the rabbit in the lawn who stays very still hoping you don't notice it. And finally when it thinks you did or you get too close, it runs away. Freezing is an adaptive behavior for the rabbit if you don't notice it. It can stay close to its food source or nest.I freeze, too. It really, really bugs me. I think it is tied up in always wanting to be a "good little girl". A good girl wouldn't fight back certainly. She wants to be loved, and part of her still wants that love from whoever is threatening her, so she wouldn't flee. Freezing is a way to try not to be noticed. And to pretend, in a way perhaps, that it is not happening.
On some level, freezing is an adaptive response, and one that probably worked successfully in the past. That's why we would tend to do it now. If it worked in some meaningful way in the past, we keep doing it even if it is no longer appropriate. It's maladaptive at this point, but that doesn't make it a crazy or pointless behavior.
But I suppose it can be unlearned. I've often thought I should take a women's self defense course. Mostly to get over my freezing and inhibitions towards action.
Please don't beat yourself up over freezing whether in your dream or in real life. In some cases, it actually may keep you alive.
Take care,
gg
poster:gardenergirl
thread:364059
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040703/msgs/364122.html