Posted by Bell_75 on December 22, 2003, at 5:33:22
In reply to crappy comment.., posted by Karen_kay on December 19, 2003, at 18:30:51
> Ok, so does your therapist ever say anything that offends you? I just remembered a comment he made to me during the last session and it now angers me.... To the hundreth degree...
Well, sometimes he does say things that put me off slightly but i cant remember the little things only a few.
Without sounding like a broken record, the comment about 'not fitting the criteria for depression anymore' kinda felt like he was brushing me off. It shocked me because I definately didnt see it that way.
Another thing more reccently was when we were talking about intermediate beliefs ruling my negative automatic thoughts and my high morals I have. I told him that a lot is to do with wanting my mother's approval and that she passed along her morals to me that annoy me when I exercise them within my life (like not smoking, not being promiscious, no stealing/lying/cheating blah blah). So he wrote on his white board "My mother's approval is essential" and asked me how much I live by that rule. Firstly, they werent my exact words and secondly he was making my own beliefs up for me. I corrected and informed him saying that I do feel like I need my mother's approval at times but I dont feel like I cant live without it or that my world would come crumbling down around me if I didn't have it. I have done things that she has known about and not approved of and life has gone on. No biggie!
Another comment was when I said I find that I'm not a person prone to any sort of addiction. I've tried alcohol, smoking, drugs (only marijuana) and gambling and none seem to have any sort of interest for me. I'm not really desperate to do any of them to extremes or I dont have obsessive thoughts and as for the drugs and smoking cigarettes I havent wanted to take either up.
I only brought it up with him because it made me feeling like a boring person who had nothing to wind down with , had any real hobby, was interesting or took any risks/rebelled.
So his reply to me saying I dont get addictions was.."I think you do have an addiction....your anxiety."
All because I told him I didnt go jogging down at the local park because I didnt want people seeing me or vice versa. So I'll admit to have some anxiety but not to the point of it being an addiction. He said it was an obsession for me and I'm like "whaaaaaaaaat?"
I think those sort of comments moreso irk me because I get paranoid or abit uncomfortable when I feel he is passing judgement on me. I get abit edgy when I hear him start a sentence with "I think you....(insert psych's opinion/observation".
Sometimes he says "correct me if I'm wrong" other times he sits there with this smug look on his face like hes thinking "ha! I know I'm right!".
In last week's session I was really anxious and on edge from the day's and the whole week's events, I wanted to talk to him about it but he seemed stuck on the part about me needing my mother's approval so while he was writing on the board I looked at the jar of coloured pencils on the desk beside me and started turning the ones that were upside down to point upwards like the rest. I said to him with a bit of a laugh:
"aah I'm goin' all monk! I was sitting in the waiting room straighting up all the phamplets and magazines now I'm doing this like Monk does and I cant help it. Have you seen that show about the detective with OCD?"
I sort of half wanted this to lead into why I was stressed moreso than usual and he just laughed and said:
"Don't get into that habit its a bad habit" and "No I avoid shows about people with OCD and stuff like that because I see enough of it here."
*grumbles* all I could think was 'well i'm not just fidgetting/neat freak here to put on a show for you I do it alot at home too' but meh sometimes his blaise attitude puts me off.
Yeah I admit I can be over-sensitive and that I do have a known habit of negative mind reading.
In my opinion, I believe professional therapists should have consideration for clients who are obviously sensitive people and as ridiculous as some things they say sound they shouldn't poke fun at them or tease. Unintentionally harmless or not.Now I've had this little rant, I feel like saying all this to him (when I get that big shipment of assertiveness I've been waiting for) and telling him to back off. Yeah woman hear me roar!
Phew!
Just a pity I wont be seeing him for another 3 weeks and by the time that comes around I will have talked myself out of it.I just gotta remember that, professional or not, no one knows me better than me.
poster:Bell_75
thread:291010
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031221/msgs/292294.html