Posted by alexandra_k on October 15, 2013, at 19:52:13
In reply to Re: ECT-Advice Needed, posted by baseball55 on October 15, 2013, at 19:08:47
i had bilateral, too.
one idea is that the memory loss associated with the ect is at least part of what is theraputic about it. you forget the reasons why you are depressed, or something like that.
they only discovered it because they found that the depressives who had epilepsy said they often felt better after they had seizures. so then they thought of intentionally inducing seizures. and there we have it. the introduction of muscle relaxant was significant.
i had some weird motor firing sequence patterns. when i started at the gym. basic inability to do basic movement patterns like squat or deadlift or whatever. i've learned that this is actually quite common for a lot of people... but i had it big time. i did wonder whether ect might have messed up my firing sequences. trauma on impact probably did similar.
i felt... i remember feeling awful immediately after. confused. floaty. something was wrong - but i couldn't pinpoint quite what. helpless. nurses etc were more careful with me. because now they had a reason they could understand. doctors etc. everyone showed an intense interest in how i felt all of a sudden. in being careful with me. i wonder if that is what is curative.
oh. one weird thing... this girl i went to school with. i didn't know her very well... but knew her a bit. she was training to be a nurse and i caught her on her rotation. i didn't say anything and neither did she... but that weirded me out and saddened me a great deal. that she was there for part of it. it was like... she stood in for everyone from high school. shame. embarrassment. vague feelings of that. because she was there. that was just for one treatment though. but piecing that together... remembering who she was and why she was there.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:1052158
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20130930/msgs/1052347.html