Posted by delna on October 7, 2009, at 0:36:08
In reply to Re: What is the best drug for suicidal thoughts? » delna, posted by bleauberry on October 6, 2009, at 19:44:19
> Well, if we use analytical research as a guide, Lithium fits the profile. Zyprexa does also, but I understand the APs are not an option for you due to TD? But then again, one has to ask, which is worse, TD or death? And what is the degree of TD? Severe paralyzing? Moderate inconvenience? Minor? Important questions.
I think Lithium may be the answer although I have had it before for several months in the past at a good dose and it did nothing for me. It didn't make me a zombie or anything but just made me really fat (not that this is an issue right now. But regardless it didn't help at all and I was suicidal and self-destructive then too. I must add that Lamictal really helped initially but now it just contains my mood and stops me from going high. I am a wierdo because increasing Lamictal makes me aggressive ( bizzare)
I have a condition which is very rare known as tardive pain syndrome and the pain is in the genital region (sorry if that is TMI) which makes it excruciating. I'm very, very lucky that when I got off the Geodon the pain vanished but it may not go the next time. Anti-psychotics have been contraindicated for me by my Neurologist and psychiatrist (both Indian and American).If the pain comes back I can't live with it. I tried really hard because Geodon was a miracle for me and for the first time since I was 12 (am now 35) I was normal and had a job too! I still cry about having to give it up- it really killed me to do so but eventually the pain was way to much. It actually made me want to throw myself out of the window even though I was really happy mood wise and energy wise. No drug worked on it at all.....and I tried them all. :(
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> If we look to experience rather than science, then I would say Ritalin.Sadly Ritalin is not an option for me. Have been challenged with it many times (because of fatigue) and it de-stabilizes because I have bipolar. By that I mean I am impulsive and hysterical and show typical symptoms of dysphoric mania which itself makes me suicidal. I think in this state it is seriously dangerous.
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> It makes sense that the first immediate thing that should be done is to increase Parnate at the fastest rate you can tolerate.Yes, I am going to discuss this with my doctor today. Alternatively he will switch me to effexor because it is easier to tolerate at higher doses (have had it before) and I can titrate up fast (but without the washout period- dangerous I know but what are my options really.) Parnate is really sedating which is why he has started me on a low dose I guess, since I am by nature a sleepy person who needs upto 400mg Provigil and 2 wellbutrins (and caffeine pills) to stay awake even when I am on a non- sedating drug!
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> India is well known for unique potent herbs. I can't help but wonder why they are not in your arsenal? Drugs have considerable limitations and weaknesses. When combined with certain herbs that support the body as a whole in addition to relieving the symptoms, outcomes can be greatly enhanced and hastened.These herbs are really potent and chemical in nature (as are all psychoactive agents) and hence are pretty dangerous.Many commonly used ones here are defined as poisons by the WHO. What makes them worse in terms of safety is that they are unrefined unlike approved drugs and contain alot of contaminants. Ayurveda works for some things but not without serious interactions especially with any CNS drugs. Infact especially with Parnate. But I am trying homeopathy side by side as well as fish oil and vitamin B12 which are benign.
>> Do you have a calendar handy? Please write another post on October 14. On that day, please submit another post on how that day is going, what you had to eat, what the weather is like, anything going on in the town or city you live in? I'm very interested to hear all that. I will be in and out until then and not likely to touch base until then. So I will look forward to you telling me all you can about India and your day.
Yes, I will. Thank you so much for your concern.
You cannot imagine how much that helps me.> In the meantime, stay in touch on other threads and start new ones. Visit the other forums here. But remember Oct 14.
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> Lithium, Ritalin, Increase Parnate, Herbs.
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> Another quick help, though it is hard and probably not what anyone feeling real bad wants to do, go out and run. Run at a steady pace, not too fast, get breathing hard, and just keep running. 30minutes to an hour minimum. Stop and walk to catch your breath, then start running again. You'll be totally exhausted and have some sore muscles, but you will also experience a flood of good-emotion hormones and neurotransmitters that you body is not accustomed to, and it will feel like relief. It can last a day. If your depression is caused by an underlying unsuspected organism infection, not at all unlikely (Lyme, Candida, protozoa, Babesia, worms, and a dozen others) the running will flood them with heat and oxygen, which they hate. You'll force them into dormancy and partial death for a short while, giving you some relief.Sorry to sound so negative on all fronts but I promise you exercise makes me ANGRY.I always joke that it releases the wrong neurotransmitters for me. I actually start becoming agitated and aggressive (verbally)with random people on the street. I am not normally aggressive at all. I think I need to be in the right state of mind to do something like run. Been trying yoga but even that was proving too much for me. But I do plan to restart once I am better because as you say exercise (as long as it is not too vigorous) helps!
Also I have been checked for every organism under the sun (because I did my masters and was exposed to pathogens and I insisted on being tested) but it all came clear. I have always hoped I simply had an infection- maybe it would at least explain the darn fatigue but no luck there. I've had so many tests for infections (including exotic ones because in India we have the ALL ;-) ) and blood tests to rule out organic causes but nothing explains it (the fatigue of the bipolar. Funnily enough before I ever accepted I had a psychiatric condition yet was suicidal my sister gave me great hope by telling me that perhaps I just had mercury in my fillings and to go get checked. So I have always been looking for alternative explanations (including demonic possession!!! )because I hate drugs (but have come to realize that they are really the only things that help)
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> Eagerly waiting to see what's going on on October 14.thank you so much again. Sorry for being so negative on all your good suggestions. Frankly I would have suggested these excellent things to someone myself but in my case I seem to have a problem with everything. And sorry for such a long post........
lots of Love
DPS: Will report on 14th. take care while you are away..
poster:delna
thread:919942
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20091001/msgs/920043.html