Posted by rjlockhart on June 26, 2007, at 22:55:21
i swear i could kill someone for doing this.
I am so miserable, my cat just pooped and it stinks. GOD, let me go clean this crap up.
Im back. Somedip sh*t theft when i was at someone's house, i felt panic attack coming hard, i had to ride this whole thing, it was close to psychosis, i finally had to tell some help me there something wrong,
I was fine i was talking 90miles an hour about a movie we where watching, i was what i would say manic but no one knew it, everything was PERFECT, when im manic i just talk and make people laugh with just quick witted comments, thats what started it, its like axes in your head won't stop and they go faster and faster, the only way to vent it is to talk.
Some of my friends noticed i was really going off the walls, jumping in the pool (i went underwater to pray to jesus), doing flips on the trampiline, and talking while i was doing it, i never saw myself this intese. I felt i was the spotlight of everything. I love it when i get like this, but then it blows like circuts in my head and i start to have bloodshot eyes, red all over, I am so freaking fun,
But i noticed while everything was so good, something in my head, there is something that just triggered, and mental instablity starts but i act just fine when in my head im in mental hell.
I didnt have Xanax (not the whole prescription) but a sample just incase a episode happened.... which it did bad.
I started asking one of their parents can you pray for me before i go to the hospital? Thankfully the mom was a prayer intersessor for a company. If you have ever had a panic attack where your thinking your leaving your body that was what i experienced.
It peaked over 1 hour the maxed 45min into the hour.
Now i didnt act like a panic person (even though in my head i wanted to run in a hospital and say HELP) I was very as calm as i could be, but it didnt last good.
Eventaually it ended slowly, i was EXHAUSED for the 10 hours of non stop talking, doing crazy things.
I dont even know if Xanax would of helped this one, but i survived a bad one.
Now i hope who ever stole that out of my car gets caught.
I was so stupid to leave the prescription bottle out saying "Xanax" with the door unlocked.
But this was in a high estates neighboorhood.
Life is grand...............
Matt
poster:rjlockhart
thread:766093
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070622/msgs/766093.html