Posted by Fivefires on February 12, 2007, at 16:08:18
In reply to Re: Well Benzos Worked For Years Now No Hope » Fivefires, posted by Phillipa on February 9, 2007, at 12:24:04
I've been 'so out of it' everyone, I'm following up P's post in the middle of thread.
I am just like P. Anxiety is my the definition of myself. Once I learned that someone I loved could hurt me, I had a panic attack, and I've had anxiety ever since. My folks took me to an ER and gave me a benzo and I did wonderful. But then I saw a P and he said I needed an AD too, and I made anxiety accelerate. Twenty years +- later benzos are all that work for me.
Docs won't treat me w/ a 'stand alone benzo'.
It's like u must be on an AD, then we'll allow benzo.
(So, currently I've begun Lexapro and I'm listless and groggy all day, and have zombieitis and 'headaches'. A lot of ADs have caused headaches .. maybe something to do w/ CNS and my C2-3, 3-4, 4-5 injury.
Yes Lexapro is helping w/ anxiety, because I don't feel a damn thing'! Is that the intention of treatment? I wasn't causing anyone any trouble; I don't need to be 'sedated' so as not to harm self, another, or made anyone lift a finger to help me!
And, then I hear 'an antipsychotic might help' my anxiety. But, I've been on a couple and gotten really sick ... mostly headaches.
(Can I throw this in here? What is a psychotic episode at its smallest? Can it be something so small that one can almost overlook it?)
If the intention is to put me in a state 'I feel nothing .. no happiness, no sadness, no orgasmic ability, NO ANXIETY ... well then ADs work for anxiety. But, if the intention is to help me become a functioning person in society w/ the ability to have human emotions, ADs have never done that for me (w/ the exception of a couple stints of E-XR or Prozac and a very short lived reaction to Zoloft. I've d.c.'d E-XR quite a few times because fear high dosages of it, and other times on Prozac, it acted 'opposite' to the first time on it .. made me feel bad.
So what I'm saying is that if I had to pick ADs that were successful at all in the past, those are the two, but tried at alternate times in my life, they were not successful. (As u can see, I'm having troub' w/ my thought processes and repeating myself I think and I'm sorry.)
Do I have to trade off feeling human w/ real emotions, because I have high anxiety and need benzodiazepines, but they are too addictive or whatever, and there's a movement away from them, after I've been on them 20 +_ years?
Do I have to do this by squelching all emotions, anxiety as well, because all Ps want to cut back on benzo use?
Apologize so scattered in followup posts.
At this time P said, well if you do well on AD, I'll consider a Valium/Xanax switcheroo.
I'm on Lexapro - Knocks me out, stay groggy and listless all day, feel like zombie, headache, but it is day 3 or 4, and I dare not call P.
I had some complaints about Valium, so I'd been asking P to add in a prn fast acting benzo.
I know Valium was a Godsend when had 'nervous breakdown' (something which I've been told so often doesn't exist that I've become lackadaisical to hearing it) but after 2yrs, the 'depressant affect' of Valium is occuring .. inactivity, laziness, agoraphobia.
I keep wondering something and wonder if any of you have a theory about it.
Could a person who seems to do badly on ADs (except Prozac at one time, Effexor-XR at other times, a short-lived window on Zoloft) be indicative of being bipolar?
There, I've said it. I've been frightened to say it. One 'why?' is because I don't want to be categorized. Another 'why?' is because my knowledge of self fits PTSD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and borderline'. My personality has changed drastically from that as a teenager, young adult.
tks, 5f
poster:Fivefires
thread:731116
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070207/msgs/732177.html