Posted by UgottaHaveHope on August 13, 2006, at 4:38:01
In reply to Re: How do you know when you're really going to do it? » RN320, posted by Phillipa on August 12, 2006, at 21:47:45
My heart goes out to you and I'm sorry you are in extreme pain. I don't think there is a person alive who hasn't thought about what it would be like if they were not around, especially during life's challenging times, and it sounds like you have an overwhelming amount of those.
However, I beg you to to do three things: 1, first and foremost, you need to find some type of therapy (CBT?) or activity that transforms your mind from those negative thoughts (I struggle with worry and anxiety and have found playing computer games against others over the Internet keeps my mind occupied, challenged, and satisfied). 2, You have to got to find purpose. Surely you were not put on Earth to soley suffer and struggle. And if you were destined to go through so much emotional pain, perhaps it was to share your story with others and help them through the same situations. From reading your post, it sounds like you are a big-hearted person. Obvisously, if you didn't care or love others, you wouldn't even bother making a will (other ppl benefit from that, and not you). 3, Finally, U GOTTA HAVE HOPE. As traumatic as your emotional health has been, believe it or not, other ppl in this room (not me) have been where you are and worse, and somehow, some way found a way out of it. HOPE. New meds are coming out all the time. If ENSAM doesn't do the trick, then maybe try Nardil or something else. Or perhaps try a new pdoc who may have some different ideas.
Finally, PLEAZZZZZZZZZZZZZEEEEE keep posting your thoughts and feelings in here. There are people in here that really care and will be able to relate. Nothing you have written is something that others in here haven't thought about, too. I.E. You are not ALONE. Michael
poster:UgottaHaveHope
thread:675823
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20060810/msgs/675976.html