Posted by noa on August 30, 2000, at 9:54:44
In reply to Re: keeping taking antidepressants a secret.. » T~, posted by Greg on August 29, 2000, at 15:23:34
I initially kept it all a secret, then eventually told people.
There is no rush, but at some point, you might find it helpful to confide in at least one or two people. I can tell you that my fears about people's responses were way worse than their actual responses. But you know these people, so you can guage better than I or anyone else whether they will respond supportively.
Telling people other than a close friend or spouse or other family members is a tricky thing. I found it helpful at some point to tell some people at work, including my supervisor, in my current job (my condition had deteriorated to the point where it really made sense to provide some information), but in some work places, it would not be such a good idea.
For example, in a previous workplace, I shared it with close co-workers, but not my supervisor. Good thing I did not tell my supervisor anything about my depressive illness, because I ended up in an adversarial relationship with my employer later on, and thanks to our rather viscious legal system, the question about my health and mental health was raised to discredit me. It was bad enough that because I had told some coworkers, the same information that I shared with them as I had with my therapist, would not have enjoyed privilege status. The whole issue was a red herring anyway, and had no pertinence in the case, since I did not claim any psychological damages (for this very reason!!) and the judge ruled that they could not get my medical records, thank goodness, but it was a close call. In deposition, I did have to answer some questions about conversations I had had with friends who are also coworkers, regarding my health/mental health issues. That was quite uncomfortable, to say the least.
You want to be sure that if you do disclose this to anyone, even a trusted person close to you, that you feel confident that you are comfortable with them knowing, and with the "risk" of sharing private info.
Sometimes, I think, it can take a while for "us" (allow me this generalization, and consider it applied only to those who feel it applies) to get used to the whole idea of treatment ourselves, and it is ok to keep it secret until we are ready to share. On the other hand, a supportive response from a friend or relative can HELP us to accept our selves as people who take medication for depression or other psychiatric problems.
There is no "right" way to do this. No matter what your decisions about this are, if you can frame it as being a boundary you are in control of, because, afterall, it is your private information, versus a shameful secret you are hiding from, I think that can help.
poster:noa
thread:43990
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000822/msgs/44061.html