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Re: embarassing thoughts

Posted by bob on March 19, 2000, at 11:57:21

In reply to embarassing thoughts, posted by allison on March 19, 2000, at 8:47:06

> ...Why can't these past events be buried? Why do they run through my head like a short movie? 20 years of reliving past mistakes makes for crappy days.

Hi allison,

Can't say much about your second question, but as to the first -- why do you want them buried? Maybe that's the wrong mental approach to them ... sometimes, the more you keep pushing them away, the harder they come back at you.

If you have a dog, you can appreciate this. (In most cases,) if your dog is running away from you and you want Fido to come, the best thing to do is run *away* from the dog. If you chase Fido, on the other hand, he is probably going to run away from you. The more you run away, the harder you get chased -- the more you do the chasing, the faster he runs away.

Sorry if that sounds a bit simplistic, but my dogs are often the best therapy I could want, and their behaviors speak volumes about a mental life uncontaminated by second guesses, what-ifs, and all the other mental baggage humans seem uniquely capable of inflicting upon themselves (homo sapiens? Not all the time by a LONG shot).

If it will help you "stare down" that episode and make it turn heels and run, remember this: you are here today, and that means whatever the experience was, you have survived it. You have gotten through it. Because of that, you're no longer the person you were when the episode happened -- and there is no need to think that you are.

Sometimes it's not the Beast who won't let go of us; rather, it's we who won't let go of the Beast.

my two cents ... be well, allison
bob

[my best friend is a double-l allison, too, so I just had to say something =^) ]

 

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