Posted by Shelley in Seattle on January 20, 1999, at 19:07:10
In reply to Re: Tangents, NPBR , posted by David K. on January 20, 1999, at 18:00:33
I hope your plant manager gets a lot of interesting calls, David! I remember from one of your earlier posts that he is not a very nice fellow. Luckily, it's a pretty laid-back atmosphere where I work. They think it's funny when I do silly things like that - it breaks up the monotony of the work day.
In response to Sean and humor -- (I apologize for not addressing it earlier, I skipped over your post by mistake when the board was being slow) I know it can be detrimental at times, but it's a defense mechanism that I have developed over many years, not to mention a coping strategy. I think it does add fuel to the fire when I use humor to dispel something that needs attention. As an adult, I realize I can't change the horrific childhood I had. I can try to develop compassion for the child inside me who went through it, but I get tired of the "poor-me" feeling that comes up when I have to think about it. Laughing at the ridiculousness of some of it now helps it not to sting. That doesn't mean I trivialize it, I just have to deal with it in the way that is right for me at this time. Just for the record, the story I told my therapist that sparked all this WAS funny to me now -- I don't think I hold any pain from this particular event. I had heard David Sedaris tell a story just the night before, and so it came out in a similar type of delivery.
My "family" didn't use humor. That's something I developed on my own. I can understand your concern for your nieces and nephews; I see my sister becoming more like my mother everyday, and she's making a lot of the same mistakes with her child that my mother made with us. I know what it's like to be on the receiving end of abuse and abject neglect from a parent. I never think that's funny. Ever.
Yes, some days my smile is a mask. We all have days like that.
poster:Shelley in Seattle
thread:2503
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990501/msgs/2563.html